One fine day, on the way to work...

While crossing the road on my work today there was a small black object lying in the crosswalk, and my OCD said I just had to kick it, so I did. I gave it a good boot out into the middle of the crosswalk, leaving it in the perfect position to receive a second booting (and I have my Doc Marten's on today, so I was able to deliver a really good booting). But as I gave the object a second booting I realized it was a glasses case, and I also realized there was something inside.

After the second booting the glasses case wound up in the gutter and I scooped it up and attempted to open it. It was a little tricky because it had obviously been run over by at least one car (and probably more) so the dohickey (or is that doohickey?) on the zipper had broken off, but my OCD and persistence paid off and I got it open anyway. Inside was a purple BIC lighter which still worked, a white set of ear buds which had not survived their stay in the middle of the road (and would never work again), and a small silver squarish object, with the Apple logo on one side, and the words iPod written underneath.

The object claiming to be an iPod had a couple of scratches on it and it had obviously taken a direct hit from a car tire, but it was still intact and other than the dents it looks a lot like this...
I got to work and while booting up my PC I plugged my speakers into the 3.5mm jack on this so-called iPod and flicked the Off switch to the on position. A little green light came on next to the switch and the dulcet tones of some of the Inglewood and Compton's finest talent filled the air. "F**k you, Ni&&er! Mother f**king Ni&&er!"

Well, how about that? This little silver object that claims to be an iPod really is an iPod, and even though it's been run over by a car it still works. But...I better turn it off before other people get in to work and hear it. For some reason people get offended by words like "Mother f**king Ni&&er!"

Free iPod. Now those are much nicer words :)