The right-hand lane which I use to enter the bus station's parking lot is not a right turn-only lane, so cars are free to use that right hand lane to continue straight ahead, and most vehicles in that lane do because they prefer to park in the next lot, or they're heading for the Freeway just a little further down. I find this annoying because in California, unless there are signs saying otherwise, you can make a right-hand turn on a red light, and if I don't catch the green light inevitably I find myself stopped behind someone who wants to go straight ahead. But as it's not a right turn-only lane they're doing nothing wrong, so I sit patiently and wait for the green.
Unlike most Southern Californians I always use my turn signal, and sometimes I'll pull up right behind this car, barely inches from their rear bumper, but slightly off center so if their mirrors are angled correctly my blinking turn signal is being reflected in their right-hand mirror. At times like these I'm even tempted to honk my horn at them, as if to say, "Come on, turn already." Except that's rude. They don't have their turn signal on, and if they wanted to turn they would have done so, so I sit there, patiently waiting for the light to turn green. Of course when it does there's always a couple of pedestrians from the parking lot waiting to cross the road to the bus station, so as a courteous driver (for the most part) I now feel compelled to wait for them too.
And the situation I've just described is exactly what happened this morning.
When the light went green the car in front of me drove on, straight ahead, and I pulled forward, turn signal still blinking, just like it had been doing the entire time I sat there waiting patiently for the light to turn green, then I stopped. I stopped because George, the old man who rides my bus, who had a stroke a few years back and so now walks with a pronounced limp/shuffle, good old George had stepped down into the crosswalk and was slowly hobbling across the road into which I wanted to turn.
Now I'll admit that maybe I didn't pull forward quite as much as I could have, but as far as I'm concerned yielding to pedestrians does not mean stopping your car halfway into the crosswalk so they're forced to walk around you. As far as I'm concerned, yielding to pedestrians means coming to a complete stop before your car even enters the crosswalk, and so I did.
For some reason this offended the driver of the car behind me. At first I wasn't sure if he'd flashed his headlights at me, but then he honked his horn, and then he flashed his lights again.
"Hello!" I said to myself with malicious glee. "Yielding to Pedestrians here. FUCKING wait!"
The horn honked again, accompanied by more flashing of head lights.
Now I don't know about you but when I'm being a courteous, considerate driver and yielding to pedestrians in a crosswalk, particularly slightly disabled pedestrians, specifically, slightly disabled pedestrians who I happen to know, and you're a rude, impatient, arrogant prick of a driver behind me honking your horn and flashing your lights, you've just accomplished the complete opposite of what you were trying to achieve; you've just made damn sure I'm going to completely yield to the pedestrian.
Which is what I did.
When there was enough room for me to pull forward, and even drive through behind George as he hobbled across the crosswalk, I didn't. I sat there. I would say I ignored the honking and flashing of lights, but in all truth they amused me as I waited to make sure George was well & truly clear of my path before finally driving through behind him.
Yes, I deliberately pissed this other driver off, but I don't care. I don't honk at drivers blocking my path just because I want to turn and they want to go straight ahead. If you don't want to sit behind me while I yield to pedestrians, don't drive in MY lane. It's that fucking simple.
Showing posts with label Rant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rant. Show all posts
Tuesday, June 07, 2011
Friday, April 29, 2011
I'll take royal weddings for $32,000,000, Alex...
The Royal wedding is the talk of the town, in particular the cost to John Q. Public. Apparently the Royal family is picking up the bulk of the tab but you don't have to be an economist to know where they get most of their wealth from. Investments? Yes, okay. But where did they get the money from to invest? More...investments? I see. This could take longer than I thought.
When one of my friends made a comment on FB about the Royal wedding one of his friends referenced the figure $32,000,000, which a little research revealed is the approximate cost (in U.S. dollars) of security for the wedding. Just security. It doesn't include the flowers, or the food, or booking the chapel, or sending out the invitations, or the bridesmaids' dresses, the open bar at the reception (which probably cost a lot more than US$32M). The cost of security alone was estimated at US$32M. So this figure was referenced by my friend's FB friend, along with the comment that "you could feed the world" on US$32M.
The global population is estimated to be approx. 3,915,000,000. Dividing $32M between 3,915,000,000 people comes out to half a cent each. Now I know that two people can eat as cheaply as one, unless one of those two is a pregnant woman. Seriously. Have you seen what they can put away? There's a reason Home Town Buffet tried to ban pregnant women from their restaurants. No, they didn't. I'm kidding. April Fools! What? It's still April. Who says April Fools has to be limited to just the first day of the month? Have you ever tried fooling someone on April Fools Day? Good luck! You can't fool anyone on April Fools' Day because they know it's coming! What idiot thought up "April Fools" then decided to limit it to one, specific day? That guy was the real April Fool. Amiright?
So, back to two people eating as cheaply as one, which we know is a crock. If two people can eat as cheaply as one, then four must be able to eat as cheap as two, right? And because two can eat as cheaply as one, logically that means four can also eat as cheap as one. It makes perfect fucking sense IF two really can eat as cheaply as one. But because four cannot eat as cheaply as one then two cannot eat as cheaply as one so forget this argument because it holds about as much water as Jesus' cupped hands. (I can't believe you went there! I thought you were going to reference the Loaves & Fishes thing!)
So, back to feeding the world on $32M, or 1/2 a cent each. Let me know how that works out for you.
This leads into the real problem with the world today. There is not enough money, not enough food, not enough resources, not enough anything to take care of everyone living on the planet. You can throw all the money you want at the problem but it won't solve a thing. Sure, a few people will live, but many are going to die and nobody can do a damned thing about it because there's just too many of us. Some of us need to die. A lot of us. And the rest of us? We need to let them die.
What's that? I should start by killing myself? Riiiiiiight. I'm a producer (and yes, a consumer). I'm living in a First World Country, with a job, making money, and providing for my family. Other than my employer nobody is giving me money to buy me food, or clothes, or a computer. I've got a daytime job, I'm doing alright.
But all those Third World people sitting on their arses in the dust, just existing (not living, I'm not calling that living because they're alive but they're not living; they're existing) they can die. Because they're not producing. They're not working, or doing anything to sustain themselves, because Karma dealt them a handful of crap and they literally cannot survive without a handout because the land cannot support them. Give them a fish today and what does that accomplish? Nothing! You've fed them for one day. Aah, so teach them to fish, I hear you say. Wise you are, grasshopper, for if we teach them to fish, at least they'll have a hobby to keep them occupied rather than sit on their arse in the dust all day. /sarcasm off
This is the truth: There are far too many people in this world, we cannot help them all, and complaining that the money spent on the Royal Wedding could have been used to feed them is a pipe dream. Okay, maybe just counting all the starving Third Worlders, maybe $32M could have fed them for one day. Maybe. But what do they do for the rest of the year? What about the other 364 days? Anyone got a spare $11,648,000,000 lying around? You do! Excellent! Let's have it. Oh, and if you could come up with $11,680,000,000 by the end of the year...for next year...that would be great, yeah.
People need a hand-up, not a hand-out, but if the country will not sustain them at their current population even a hand-out is pointless. You'd be better off letting them die then plowing them into the soil. If nothing else, at least they'd make good fertilizer. Finally! They're producers! /black_humor off
Don't be offended, accept the truth; the world is grossly overpopulated, millions of people need to die, and we need to let them. It's okay to be a dreamer, but we live in the real world.
/end rant
When one of my friends made a comment on FB about the Royal wedding one of his friends referenced the figure $32,000,000, which a little research revealed is the approximate cost (in U.S. dollars) of security for the wedding. Just security. It doesn't include the flowers, or the food, or booking the chapel, or sending out the invitations, or the bridesmaids' dresses, the open bar at the reception (which probably cost a lot more than US$32M). The cost of security alone was estimated at US$32M. So this figure was referenced by my friend's FB friend, along with the comment that "you could feed the world" on US$32M.
The global population is estimated to be approx. 3,915,000,000. Dividing $32M between 3,915,000,000 people comes out to half a cent each. Now I know that two people can eat as cheaply as one, unless one of those two is a pregnant woman. Seriously. Have you seen what they can put away? There's a reason Home Town Buffet tried to ban pregnant women from their restaurants. No, they didn't. I'm kidding. April Fools! What? It's still April. Who says April Fools has to be limited to just the first day of the month? Have you ever tried fooling someone on April Fools Day? Good luck! You can't fool anyone on April Fools' Day because they know it's coming! What idiot thought up "April Fools" then decided to limit it to one, specific day? That guy was the real April Fool. Amiright?
So, back to two people eating as cheaply as one, which we know is a crock. If two people can eat as cheaply as one, then four must be able to eat as cheap as two, right? And because two can eat as cheaply as one, logically that means four can also eat as cheap as one. It makes perfect fucking sense IF two really can eat as cheaply as one. But because four cannot eat as cheaply as one then two cannot eat as cheaply as one so forget this argument because it holds about as much water as Jesus' cupped hands. (I can't believe you went there! I thought you were going to reference the Loaves & Fishes thing!)
So, back to feeding the world on $32M, or 1/2 a cent each. Let me know how that works out for you.
This leads into the real problem with the world today. There is not enough money, not enough food, not enough resources, not enough anything to take care of everyone living on the planet. You can throw all the money you want at the problem but it won't solve a thing. Sure, a few people will live, but many are going to die and nobody can do a damned thing about it because there's just too many of us. Some of us need to die. A lot of us. And the rest of us? We need to let them die.
What's that? I should start by killing myself? Riiiiiiight. I'm a producer (and yes, a consumer). I'm living in a First World Country, with a job, making money, and providing for my family. Other than my employer nobody is giving me money to buy me food, or clothes, or a computer. I've got a daytime job, I'm doing alright.
But all those Third World people sitting on their arses in the dust, just existing (not living, I'm not calling that living because they're alive but they're not living; they're existing) they can die. Because they're not producing. They're not working, or doing anything to sustain themselves, because Karma dealt them a handful of crap and they literally cannot survive without a handout because the land cannot support them. Give them a fish today and what does that accomplish? Nothing! You've fed them for one day. Aah, so teach them to fish, I hear you say. Wise you are, grasshopper, for if we teach them to fish, at least they'll have a hobby to keep them occupied rather than sit on their arse in the dust all day. /sarcasm off
This is the truth: There are far too many people in this world, we cannot help them all, and complaining that the money spent on the Royal Wedding could have been used to feed them is a pipe dream. Okay, maybe just counting all the starving Third Worlders, maybe $32M could have fed them for one day. Maybe. But what do they do for the rest of the year? What about the other 364 days? Anyone got a spare $11,648,000,000 lying around? You do! Excellent! Let's have it. Oh, and if you could come up with $11,680,000,000 by the end of the year...for next year...that would be great, yeah.
People need a hand-up, not a hand-out, but if the country will not sustain them at their current population even a hand-out is pointless. You'd be better off letting them die then plowing them into the soil. If nothing else, at least they'd make good fertilizer. Finally! They're producers! /black_humor off
Don't be offended, accept the truth; the world is grossly overpopulated, millions of people need to die, and we need to let them. It's okay to be a dreamer, but we live in the real world.
/end rant
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Fun with Voicemail
For several years our office never had voicemail, except for the receptionist (and maybe our Program Manager). Then we moved to a new office, with new phones, and a new phone system, and we finally entered the 21st century and had personal voicemail. Hooray!
That's actually not as exciting as it sounds. The novelty quickly wore off, and the red LED on our phone's handle signifying we had voicemail quickly became a thing of dread, especially when you handle a lot of problem calls. Some people took to covering the handle of their phone with a sticky note, which was rather obvious if you looked at their desk. I went one better. I discovered the LED was not in the handle but beneath it, and that a clear lens through the entire handle allowed the LED to shine through. One expertly applied piece of paper later, and the red LED disappeared from view. No red LED, no voicemails, right? Yeeeeeeah, it didn't quite work like that.
But out of sight out of mind, did. The problem then was forgetting to check the voicemail for a couple of days, and when you eventually logged in hearing, "You have 56 new message."
O_O
But there was also a trick to handling that. Alternately pressing the 3 & 1 keys quickly reduced that number to zero.
What?
If it's really important, they'll call back.
Besides, if I go on a 2-week vacation and set my phone message to inform any callers to call me back in 2 weeks, or that for immediate assistance they can call "Jack Black" on 555-1234, then I'm not making any promises about returning any messages left during those 2 weeks that I'm gone. Either call Jack Black now, or call me when I get back. That's how it works. I've been gone for 2 weeks. I've got a ton of work to catch up on. How am I supposed to get any work done if I'm returning calls all day?
If it's important, they'll call back.
Then there's those voicemails left on the front desk phone, which the receptionist listens to, then forwards to the appropriate person/section. Except she doesn't. Oh, she listens to them, but she doesn't forward them to the appropriate person.
She forwards them to me.
Even though the caller doesn't actually ask for me, nor do they ask to speak to someone in my section. In fact sometimes the caller doesn't even mention why they're calling at all, but she still forwards the message to me.
Why? Because I get in early o_O
Apparently her sole criteria for deciding who is the correct party to forward a caller/message is based on who is physically present in the office at that time.
I just now slipped out for coffee, got back to my desk, and there's the red LED (I felt guilty about not being able to see it, and you can only delete 56 voicemails so many times without repercussion). I was actually expecting a call because I'd just sent out an email to a couple of folks and I want a response from them, but I want it in writing so I have something solid on which to base my decision. So I check my voicemail and it's not an outside call, well it is, but it's an outside call forwarded from someone else's voicemail box. This is not the voicemail I was looking for. Heh heh. What? That's gold, that is.
I listen to the message, twice, and I have no idea what the caller wants, or why the sender forwarded the message to me. So I hit 4 to reply to the message (which sends it back to the person who forwarded it to me, straight into their voicemail box. Karma, baby.). "Yeeeeeah," I say, in my best Lumbergh voice, "this is your Cap'n speaking. You forwarded the following message to me, and I don't know why. The lady doesn't ask for me, and she doesn't mention my section or what we do. I have no idea what she's even talking about. So if you could just go ahead and call her back, that'd be great. Yeeeeeah."
Two minutes later my phone rings, which is about enough time for someone to notice the red LED on their phone, listen to my message, then call me. I glance at the caller ID and lo! It's the morning receptionist!
Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
(You have to say that like Gomer Pyle, otherwise it doesn't work.)
Me and her...let's call her Pyle, shall we? So Pyle and I, we have a good old chat, and she tells me it was her (she?) who forwarded the message to me, as if I didn't know that. (Actually I didn't realize it was her, but I should have) Pyle proceeds to tell me that she listened to the message, twice, before deciding to forward it to me. I tell her I listened to it as well, twice, and that the woman didn't ask about our section, never mentioned what we do, or said anything even remotely related to my job function.
Pyle tells me she knows that, but that she can't call the woman back because she doesn't have a Long Distance-authorization code and the caller is in the next county (We need to enter this code when we dial in order to authorize long-distance call). Actually Pyle does have an LD code, but she says she forgot it.
Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
And she forwarded the message to me because?
She knew my coworker wasn't in the office.
Surprise! Surprise! Sur...wait. What?
My coworker, who works in my section, who has the same job function as me, and for whom the call would also not be relevant, was not in the office at that time, and Pyle knew that, and so she forwarded the call to me instead???
Surprise! Surprise! Sur...that actually gets old really quickly. The perils of working with a Gomer Pyle, I guess.
I know M is not in yet, Pyle says, so can you call the woman back and ask her what she wants?
Perhaps you should call HR and ask them for your LD code so you can call her, I reply.
Eventually I work out why the caller was calling and she did call the correct office, and Pyle didn't completely screw up because I actually used to work in the Section the caller needs...3 years ago!!!
PYYYYYYYYY-LE!!!
That's actually not as exciting as it sounds. The novelty quickly wore off, and the red LED on our phone's handle signifying we had voicemail quickly became a thing of dread, especially when you handle a lot of problem calls. Some people took to covering the handle of their phone with a sticky note, which was rather obvious if you looked at their desk. I went one better. I discovered the LED was not in the handle but beneath it, and that a clear lens through the entire handle allowed the LED to shine through. One expertly applied piece of paper later, and the red LED disappeared from view. No red LED, no voicemails, right? Yeeeeeeah, it didn't quite work like that.
But out of sight out of mind, did. The problem then was forgetting to check the voicemail for a couple of days, and when you eventually logged in hearing, "You have 56 new message."
O_O
But there was also a trick to handling that. Alternately pressing the 3 & 1 keys quickly reduced that number to zero.
What?
If it's really important, they'll call back.
Besides, if I go on a 2-week vacation and set my phone message to inform any callers to call me back in 2 weeks, or that for immediate assistance they can call "Jack Black" on 555-1234, then I'm not making any promises about returning any messages left during those 2 weeks that I'm gone. Either call Jack Black now, or call me when I get back. That's how it works. I've been gone for 2 weeks. I've got a ton of work to catch up on. How am I supposed to get any work done if I'm returning calls all day?
If it's important, they'll call back.
Then there's those voicemails left on the front desk phone, which the receptionist listens to, then forwards to the appropriate person/section. Except she doesn't. Oh, she listens to them, but she doesn't forward them to the appropriate person.
She forwards them to me.
Even though the caller doesn't actually ask for me, nor do they ask to speak to someone in my section. In fact sometimes the caller doesn't even mention why they're calling at all, but she still forwards the message to me.
Why? Because I get in early o_O
Apparently her sole criteria for deciding who is the correct party to forward a caller/message is based on who is physically present in the office at that time.
I just now slipped out for coffee, got back to my desk, and there's the red LED (I felt guilty about not being able to see it, and you can only delete 56 voicemails so many times without repercussion). I was actually expecting a call because I'd just sent out an email to a couple of folks and I want a response from them, but I want it in writing so I have something solid on which to base my decision. So I check my voicemail and it's not an outside call, well it is, but it's an outside call forwarded from someone else's voicemail box. This is not the voicemail I was looking for. Heh heh. What? That's gold, that is.
I listen to the message, twice, and I have no idea what the caller wants, or why the sender forwarded the message to me. So I hit 4 to reply to the message (which sends it back to the person who forwarded it to me, straight into their voicemail box. Karma, baby.). "Yeeeeeah," I say, in my best Lumbergh voice, "this is your Cap'n speaking. You forwarded the following message to me, and I don't know why. The lady doesn't ask for me, and she doesn't mention my section or what we do. I have no idea what she's even talking about. So if you could just go ahead and call her back, that'd be great. Yeeeeeah."
Two minutes later my phone rings, which is about enough time for someone to notice the red LED on their phone, listen to my message, then call me. I glance at the caller ID and lo! It's the morning receptionist!
Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
(You have to say that like Gomer Pyle, otherwise it doesn't work.)
Me and her...let's call her Pyle, shall we? So Pyle and I, we have a good old chat, and she tells me it was her (she?) who forwarded the message to me, as if I didn't know that. (Actually I didn't realize it was her, but I should have) Pyle proceeds to tell me that she listened to the message, twice, before deciding to forward it to me. I tell her I listened to it as well, twice, and that the woman didn't ask about our section, never mentioned what we do, or said anything even remotely related to my job function.
Pyle tells me she knows that, but that she can't call the woman back because she doesn't have a Long Distance-authorization code and the caller is in the next county (We need to enter this code when we dial in order to authorize long-distance call). Actually Pyle does have an LD code, but she says she forgot it.
Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!
And she forwarded the message to me because?
She knew my coworker wasn't in the office.
Surprise! Surprise! Sur...wait. What?
My coworker, who works in my section, who has the same job function as me, and for whom the call would also not be relevant, was not in the office at that time, and Pyle knew that, and so she forwarded the call to me instead???
Surprise! Surprise! Sur...that actually gets old really quickly. The perils of working with a Gomer Pyle, I guess.
I know M is not in yet, Pyle says, so can you call the woman back and ask her what she wants?
Perhaps you should call HR and ask them for your LD code so you can call her, I reply.
Eventually I work out why the caller was calling and she did call the correct office, and Pyle didn't completely screw up because I actually used to work in the Section the caller needs...3 years ago!!!
PYYYYYYYYY-LE!!!
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Things that piss me off
aka Come to the Dark Side.
We all have a dark side (well, most of us) and it's our ability to not give into the dark side which separates us from the Serial Killers (I think). It's the part of us we repress when we encounter displays of sheer arrogance or stupidity which make us want to scream out loud and beat someone to death, preferably with their own bloody arm which we've just torn off at the shoulder.
Like the woman at the check-out ahead of you, who stands there, purse on her shoulder, watching as the clerk rings up all her items, one by one. And it's only when she's finally told the total that she takes her purse off her shoulder and start digging around in it for her wallet. Wait. No. She's taking out...her checkbook?! You're freaking kidding me!!! AAarrghh! Have fun writing out your check...with NO ARM!!!! BITCH!!!
* EDIT - Just to clarify, in case it's not abundantly clear, it's not that she's paying by check which pisses me off. She could be using a credit card, cash, etc. What pisses me off is that she waits to hear the total before she even starts to rummage through her purse looking for her checkbook/wallet.
Then there's the old people who come up to a pedestrian crossing just as it changes from Walk to , and what do they do? Do they walk up to the curb then patiently wait a minute or so for the light to cycle so they can cross? Hell NO!. They run (okay, they're old; it's running to them) those last few metres to the curb, hop down into the road, and then? They resume walking at their doddering old pace across the road, in front of all those cars which are now facing a green light but can't go because there's a fricken' old person crossing in front of them!
I had an old woman do this just last week. I could see the lights from where I was sitting in my car and just as this old woman stepped down into the street the Don't Walk light stopped blinking and went a solid red DON'T WALK. And the traffic light changed to yellow. And what did she do? Did she take two steps back up onto the curb behind her? Yeah right! With 6 lanes of traffic ahead of her she started running. Just as the left-turn lane got their green turn arrow and the first car hit the gas she darted out in front of him, and he slammed on the brakes so hard they locked up and this old woman freaked out at the sudden screeching of tires right beside her, which fortunately caused her to run even faster. And we laughed and yelled (to ourselves) Run! Run, you old bitch! Run! Fall! Break a hip or two! RUN! RUUUUUUNNN!!!
I see teenagers do this sometimes, too, except the arrogant shits don't run, they slowly saunter across in an arrogant "I've got aaaaall day to cross this road." kind of way, and they walk so slowly that even though they started to cross when the light first changed, it changes again on them when they're only halfway through. Do they hurry up when they see the light changing? HELL NO!!! They know nobody is going to willingly hit them, and they continue to stroll across at a snail's pace, but now they're wearing this arrogant, shit-eating grin that makes you clench your steering wheel in a white knuckle death grip and grit your teeth because the Dark Side desperately wants to wipe that grin off their face with your front bumper! Please let us do it! Pleeease!!!
But we don't. We don't tear people's arms off and beat them to death with the wet end (and it has nothing to do with how physically hard that would be to do), and we don't run down old ladies or teenagers crossing against the light, no matter how much they deserve it.
But we do give into the Dark Side and kick the car which didn't stop for us even though we were already in the crosswalk.
We also punch the rear window of the van whose driver waved at us as he almost ran us down in the crosswalk. As if a wave made it okay to risk committing vehicular manslaughter.
And we also stared down the guy in Cheesecake Factory who not only didn't step aside for the wife despite being asked twice, he then got up in her face when she said he was rude. That's when we let the Dark Side come out (but only a little bit) and we stepped up and stared him down. And as he stared back and his eyes twitched from one side of our face to the other, betraying his nervousness, the Dark Side smiled (on the inside, where it couldn't be seen), until finally his teenage son grabbed his arm and dragged him away from an arse-beating. Okay, because the arse-beating never actually happened, to be honest we're not sure whose arse would have ended up being beaten and/or arrested. Which is why we should avoid yielding to the dark side, even if they have cookies.
So, what really pisses you off? What makes you want to give into the Dark Side, tear someone's head off, and shit down their neck?
We all have a dark side (well, most of us) and it's our ability to not give into the dark side which separates us from the Serial Killers (I think). It's the part of us we repress when we encounter displays of sheer arrogance or stupidity which make us want to scream out loud and beat someone to death, preferably with their own bloody arm which we've just torn off at the shoulder.
Like the woman at the check-out ahead of you, who stands there, purse on her shoulder, watching as the clerk rings up all her items, one by one. And it's only when she's finally told the total that she takes her purse off her shoulder and start digging around in it for her wallet. Wait. No. She's taking out...her checkbook?! You're freaking kidding me!!! AAarrghh! Have fun writing out your check...with NO ARM!!!! BITCH!!!
* EDIT - Just to clarify, in case it's not abundantly clear, it's not that she's paying by check which pisses me off. She could be using a credit card, cash, etc. What pisses me off is that she waits to hear the total before she even starts to rummage through her purse looking for her checkbook/wallet.
Then there's the old people who come up to a pedestrian crossing just as it changes from Walk to , and what do they do? Do they walk up to the curb then patiently wait a minute or so for the light to cycle so they can cross? Hell NO!. They run (okay, they're old; it's running to them) those last few metres to the curb, hop down into the road, and then? They resume walking at their doddering old pace across the road, in front of all those cars which are now facing a green light but can't go because there's a fricken' old person crossing in front of them!
I had an old woman do this just last week. I could see the lights from where I was sitting in my car and just as this old woman stepped down into the street the Don't Walk light stopped blinking and went a solid red DON'T WALK. And the traffic light changed to yellow. And what did she do? Did she take two steps back up onto the curb behind her? Yeah right! With 6 lanes of traffic ahead of her she started running. Just as the left-turn lane got their green turn arrow and the first car hit the gas she darted out in front of him, and he slammed on the brakes so hard they locked up and this old woman freaked out at the sudden screeching of tires right beside her, which fortunately caused her to run even faster. And we laughed and yelled (to ourselves) Run! Run, you old bitch! Run! Fall! Break a hip or two! RUN! RUUUUUUNNN!!!
I see teenagers do this sometimes, too, except the arrogant shits don't run, they slowly saunter across in an arrogant "I've got aaaaall day to cross this road." kind of way, and they walk so slowly that even though they started to cross when the light first changed, it changes again on them when they're only halfway through. Do they hurry up when they see the light changing? HELL NO!!! They know nobody is going to willingly hit them, and they continue to stroll across at a snail's pace, but now they're wearing this arrogant, shit-eating grin that makes you clench your steering wheel in a white knuckle death grip and grit your teeth because the Dark Side desperately wants to wipe that grin off their face with your front bumper! Please let us do it! Pleeease!!!
But we don't. We don't tear people's arms off and beat them to death with the wet end (and it has nothing to do with how physically hard that would be to do), and we don't run down old ladies or teenagers crossing against the light, no matter how much they deserve it.
But we do give into the Dark Side and kick the car which didn't stop for us even though we were already in the crosswalk.
We also punch the rear window of the van whose driver waved at us as he almost ran us down in the crosswalk. As if a wave made it okay to risk committing vehicular manslaughter.
And we also stared down the guy in Cheesecake Factory who not only didn't step aside for the wife despite being asked twice, he then got up in her face when she said he was rude. That's when we let the Dark Side come out (but only a little bit) and we stepped up and stared him down. And as he stared back and his eyes twitched from one side of our face to the other, betraying his nervousness, the Dark Side smiled (on the inside, where it couldn't be seen), until finally his teenage son grabbed his arm and dragged him away from an arse-beating. Okay, because the arse-beating never actually happened, to be honest we're not sure whose arse would have ended up being beaten and/or arrested. Which is why we should avoid yielding to the dark side, even if they have cookies.
So, what really pisses you off? What makes you want to give into the Dark Side, tear someone's head off, and shit down their neck?
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Incredible!
By which I mean, incredibly incompetent.
Today my office is having their March of Dimes fund raising bake sale.
After being off both Monday and Tuesday I got into work this morning, logged into my email, and the first email that catches my eye has the subject "Quarters and other coins".
No, it's not spam. It's from one of the girls organizing today's Bake Sale. It was sent at 4pm yesterday afternoon and it says: "Can I give you some dollars bills for coins? I did not have time to get change today - need it for tomorrow's bake sale."
What am I, a bank?
I've mentioned before that as I manage the office coffee fund my coworkers are often hitting me up for change, and in some cases it's not a simple request like "Can you break a twenty?" (which usually I can) but a more demanding "I need two tens." and usually it's the same woman who makes requests like this.
"I need a ten, a five, and five ones."
That's not a question because she doesn't ask if I can make change. She just hands out a twenty and demands change, in specific quantities of specific denominations.
How about twenty ones?
My response is met with the incredulous look that her own demand should have received.
"Can I give you some dollars bills for coins? I did not have time to get change today - need it for tomorrow's bake sale."
I give my response more effort than it deserved but long answer short, No, you can't. I have no change.
Now we get to the fun part, which is actually short for inFUriatiNg,
With my daughter's Girl Scout cookie orders arriving this weekend I actually came into work on Monday (even though we were closed for the President's Day holiday.) because mygreedy generous coworkers bought 45 boxes of cookies from me, and I'd be damned if was bringing that many boxes of cookies with me on the bus.
Now while most of my coworkers paid in advance for their cookies, nine coworkers did not. Knowing most of them would probably not pay $4 or $8 but would have $5 or $20 bills and so expect change, I came into work this morning with a wallet full of one and five-dollar bills so I could make change. Because I'm a former Boy Scout so I'm Prepared.
So you can imagine how irked I was to see the email from my coworker requesting I make change for her because she didn't have time to get to the bank herself. Hell-fucking-O??? Isn't there a bank right across the road from our office? Why yes, I believe there is. And yes, I know Monday was a President's Day and thus a Bank Holiday, but hell-fucking-O??? Have you not heard of delegation? If you, personally, are so busy that you can't take 10 minutes to walk across the road to the bank to get change...send someone else! Geez, Louise! Good golly, Miss Molly! Etc.
So here I am, at my desk this morning, and one of the girls comes up to me and asks for change. She has a twenty and she wants change. No, not for her cookie order. She wants change for the Bake Sale. I pull out the coffee fund tin but I already know there's no change in there (I looked earlier) so she asks if I can make change. As in me, personally.
Actually yes, I can, I reply, but I need this change for my cookie orders ("Because I'm fucking Prepared! I scream. Silently. In my mind.)
We go back & forth and I'm very reluctant to hand over all my change (all $20 of it) but in the end this woman out passive-aggressives me and I reluctantly hand over my change. Reluctantly, because I already know what's going to happen. The first couple of customers at the Bake Sale are going to pay with $20 bills, because today is payday, and there's an ATM in the building's lobby. So those first two customers will pay with $20 bills straight out of the ATM and take all of the Bake Sale's change (by which I mean my change) and the next 20 customers in line behind them? If you think they've come straight from the ATM and all have $20 bills too, then you'd be right.
And naturally, as I type this, I just had the second person come by asking if I had change for the Bake Sale.
No! I fucking don't! You already took all my change! Get the fuck out of here!
By which I mean I politely replied, No, I don't have any more change. Now fuck off. Oops. Did I say that out loud? Of course I didn't, because I'm a professional, at least I am at work. This Blog doesn't count.
Today my office is having their March of Dimes fund raising bake sale.
After being off both Monday and Tuesday I got into work this morning, logged into my email, and the first email that catches my eye has the subject "Quarters and other coins".
No, it's not spam. It's from one of the girls organizing today's Bake Sale. It was sent at 4pm yesterday afternoon and it says: "Can I give you some dollars bills for coins? I did not have time to get change today - need it for tomorrow's bake sale."
What am I, a bank?
I've mentioned before that as I manage the office coffee fund my coworkers are often hitting me up for change, and in some cases it's not a simple request like "Can you break a twenty?" (which usually I can) but a more demanding "I need two tens." and usually it's the same woman who makes requests like this.
"I need a ten, a five, and five ones."
That's not a question because she doesn't ask if I can make change. She just hands out a twenty and demands change, in specific quantities of specific denominations.
How about twenty ones?
My response is met with the incredulous look that her own demand should have received.
"Can I give you some dollars bills for coins? I did not have time to get change today - need it for tomorrow's bake sale."
I give my response more effort than it deserved but long answer short, No, you can't. I have no change.
Now we get to the fun part, which is actually short for inFUriatiNg,
With my daughter's Girl Scout cookie orders arriving this weekend I actually came into work on Monday (even though we were closed for the President's Day holiday.) because my
Now while most of my coworkers paid in advance for their cookies, nine coworkers did not. Knowing most of them would probably not pay $4 or $8 but would have $5 or $20 bills and so expect change, I came into work this morning with a wallet full of one and five-dollar bills so I could make change. Because I'm a former Boy Scout so I'm Prepared.
So you can imagine how irked I was to see the email from my coworker requesting I make change for her because she didn't have time to get to the bank herself. Hell-fucking-O??? Isn't there a bank right across the road from our office? Why yes, I believe there is. And yes, I know Monday was a President's Day and thus a Bank Holiday, but hell-fucking-O??? Have you not heard of delegation? If you, personally, are so busy that you can't take 10 minutes to walk across the road to the bank to get change...send someone else! Geez, Louise! Good golly, Miss Molly! Etc.
So here I am, at my desk this morning, and one of the girls comes up to me and asks for change. She has a twenty and she wants change. No, not for her cookie order. She wants change for the Bake Sale. I pull out the coffee fund tin but I already know there's no change in there (I looked earlier) so she asks if I can make change. As in me, personally.
Actually yes, I can, I reply, but I need this change for my cookie orders ("Because I'm fucking Prepared! I scream. Silently. In my mind.)
We go back & forth and I'm very reluctant to hand over all my change (all $20 of it) but in the end this woman out passive-aggressives me and I reluctantly hand over my change. Reluctantly, because I already know what's going to happen. The first couple of customers at the Bake Sale are going to pay with $20 bills, because today is payday, and there's an ATM in the building's lobby. So those first two customers will pay with $20 bills straight out of the ATM and take all of the Bake Sale's change (by which I mean my change) and the next 20 customers in line behind them? If you think they've come straight from the ATM and all have $20 bills too, then you'd be right.
And naturally, as I type this, I just had the second person come by asking if I had change for the Bake Sale.
No! I fucking don't! You already took all my change! Get the fuck out of here!
By which I mean I politely replied, No, I don't have any more change. Now fuck off. Oops. Did I say that out loud? Of course I didn't, because I'm a professional, at least I am at work. This Blog doesn't count.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Toyota cleared by NASA scientists...
"Armchair Physicists" know better; still blame Toyota.
20 years ago I was a young, inexperienced driver and I was backing out of my parents' driveway one evening with my sister riding shotgun, and rather than using the mirror to see, I was looking back over my shoulder. In doing so my head was turned away from our neighbor's house and so I didn't see that he had parked his car at a slight angle across our shared driveway. We lived in a rounded cul de sac and the bottom of our driveways at the curb were positioned at a slight angle to the actual driveway...hard to describe, so here's a crappy, ascii-art picture:P
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| | |
| | |
| | |
\x\ \
Our drive is on the right, our neighbor's was on the left, and his car was parked at the bottom of his driveway (x), which meant his car sort of blocked our driveway, or at least it prevented me from being able to back straight out into the road.
As I was backing up and looking back over my right shoulder (Australian, remember? Steering wheels & drivers are on the left.) my head was turned away from the neighbor's drive, and so I didn't see his car was blocking my exit.
But my sister did.
She yelled at me to STOP! and in such an urgent voice that I panicked and jammed the pedal to the floor. Except I floored the gas pedal, not the brake. As the engine rev'd and the car leaped backward I immediately realized what I'd done, and despite being a new driver I reacted with the typical lightning-fast reflexes of a teenaged video gamer, switching pedals I jammed the brake pedal to the floor. The wheels actually locked up and left skidmarks in our driveway, but we stopped in time.
This was not in a Toyota. This was in a Ford, but that's irrelevant because it was ALL driver error. All mine. That's the difference between me and all those other Toyota drivers who fell "victim" to "stuck" accelerator pedals. I'm willing to admit that I was at fault.
Floor mats getting bunched up and stuck under pedals? That's driver error, too. Why do I say that? Because part of driving is being aware of your surroundings, including noting the condition of your car. If your floor mat is loose, sliding up, and bunching up under your gas or brake pedals, whose fault is that? The car's? The manufacturer's? Riiiiight. It's your fault! It's your car, you're responsible for maintaining it, and keeping it in a safe, drivable condition.
Unfortunately for Toyota the damage was done and their reputation took a dive, which is what makes me wonder if this was not so much a case of our sue-happy nation jumping on the anti-Toyota class-action lawsuit bandwagon, or something a little more sinister. Corporate espionage, perhaps? Who knows. From here on out, it's all speculation, regardless of what NASA has to say.
*Apparently there were a few cases where accelerator pedals actually did get stuck leading to uncontrollable acceleration, but those were few & far between.
20 years ago I was a young, inexperienced driver and I was backing out of my parents' driveway one evening with my sister riding shotgun, and rather than using the mirror to see, I was looking back over my shoulder. In doing so my head was turned away from our neighbor's house and so I didn't see that he had parked his car at a slight angle across our shared driveway. We lived in a rounded cul de sac and the bottom of our driveways at the curb were positioned at a slight angle to the actual driveway...hard to describe, so here's a crappy, ascii-art picture:P
| | |
| | |
| | |
| | |
\x\ \
Our drive is on the right, our neighbor's was on the left, and his car was parked at the bottom of his driveway (x), which meant his car sort of blocked our driveway, or at least it prevented me from being able to back straight out into the road.
As I was backing up and looking back over my right shoulder (Australian, remember? Steering wheels & drivers are on the left.) my head was turned away from the neighbor's drive, and so I didn't see his car was blocking my exit.
But my sister did.
She yelled at me to STOP! and in such an urgent voice that I panicked and jammed the pedal to the floor. Except I floored the gas pedal, not the brake. As the engine rev'd and the car leaped backward I immediately realized what I'd done, and despite being a new driver I reacted with the typical lightning-fast reflexes of a teenaged video gamer, switching pedals I jammed the brake pedal to the floor. The wheels actually locked up and left skidmarks in our driveway, but we stopped in time.
This was not in a Toyota. This was in a Ford, but that's irrelevant because it was ALL driver error. All mine. That's the difference between me and all those other Toyota drivers who fell "victim" to "stuck" accelerator pedals. I'm willing to admit that I was at fault.
Floor mats getting bunched up and stuck under pedals? That's driver error, too. Why do I say that? Because part of driving is being aware of your surroundings, including noting the condition of your car. If your floor mat is loose, sliding up, and bunching up under your gas or brake pedals, whose fault is that? The car's? The manufacturer's? Riiiiight. It's your fault! It's your car, you're responsible for maintaining it, and keeping it in a safe, drivable condition.
Unfortunately for Toyota the damage was done and their reputation took a dive, which is what makes me wonder if this was not so much a case of our sue-happy nation jumping on the anti-Toyota class-action lawsuit bandwagon, or something a little more sinister. Corporate espionage, perhaps? Who knows. From here on out, it's all speculation, regardless of what NASA has to say.
*Apparently there were a few cases where accelerator pedals actually did get stuck leading to uncontrollable acceleration, but those were few & far between.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Mongolian BBQ & Tips
Over on Tesh's Blog a culinary discovery led to him making a comparison between Mongolian BBQ and MMOs, which I promptly rerailed into a rant on Tipping.
If you're not aware, Mongolian BBQ is where you start out by grabbing a bowl (that's you, personally, who grabs the bowl) and filling it (usually to overflowing) with your choice of ingredients. You pay the cashier who takes the bowl and hands it off to the cook (sometimes they're the same person) who empties the bowl onto a large (very large) hotplate, stirs the mixture with over-sized chopsticks until the food is hot and any meat ingredients are cooked, before scraping it off into a second bowl which he hands over to you.
At some point I guess you're supposed to drop a dollar into the Tips jar, conspicuously placed on the counter next to where you're standing waiting for your food.
But why?
What service have you been provided that warrants a Tip?
Not only have the cashier and cook done nothing more than some other fast food places, they've actually done less.
You yourself "took" your own order by gathering together the desired ingredients. And while the staff had to put the food items out for you to be able to do that, but they did no more than the servers at Quiznos or Baja Fresh, who keep the salsa & condiment bar stocked with fixings.
All the cashier did was ring up your transaction, just like the cashiers at every other Fast Food establishment.
All the cook did was cook/heat up your food, and while he did so right there in front of you, he did nothing more than the guy at The Steak Escape who cooks your cheesesteak sandwich right in front of you.
Do you leave a Tip at Quiznos, Baja Fresh, or The Steak Escape? I don't. Why should I?
Now don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't believe in Tipping, because I do IF the service warrants it.
The waitress at Leroys? She takes my order, brings me coffee, refills my cup, brings me more creamer if I run out, and checks if I need anything, homemade salsa or marmalade, napkins, etc. She takes care of me. She works for, earns, and deserves her tip.
But the guys at Mongolian BBQ? What did they do to earn a Tip? What did they do above and beyond every other Fast Food place that makes them so special that they deserve a Tip? Merely working in the service industry does not warrant being Tipped. Just because you made my lunch does not warrant being Tipped. In my opinion if you want a Tip, you have to earn it.
Now maybe I'm wrong here, but if so, explain how.
Explain to me why I should leave a Tip at Mongolian BBQ, but not at Quiznos, The Steak Escape, and Baja Fresh?
What about McDonalds? Shouldn't I Tip them? Because let's be honest here, the staff at McDonalds do more to enhance my dining experience than the staff at my local Mongolian BBQ.
McDonalds provide me with a clean restroom, Mongolian BBQ doesn't.
McDonalds prepare my food for me. I have to do that myself at Mongolian BBQ.
McDonalds provide me with tables & chairs, which they keep clean; Mongolian BBQ don't.
McDonalds provide my kids with a place to play so I can relax and begin slipping into a food coma. Mongolian BBQ don't do that.
What does Mongolian BBQ do that their staff deserve to be Tipped?
If you're not aware, Mongolian BBQ is where you start out by grabbing a bowl (that's you, personally, who grabs the bowl) and filling it (usually to overflowing) with your choice of ingredients. You pay the cashier who takes the bowl and hands it off to the cook (sometimes they're the same person) who empties the bowl onto a large (very large) hotplate, stirs the mixture with over-sized chopsticks until the food is hot and any meat ingredients are cooked, before scraping it off into a second bowl which he hands over to you.
At some point I guess you're supposed to drop a dollar into the Tips jar, conspicuously placed on the counter next to where you're standing waiting for your food.
But why?
What service have you been provided that warrants a Tip?
Not only have the cashier and cook done nothing more than some other fast food places, they've actually done less.
You yourself "took" your own order by gathering together the desired ingredients. And while the staff had to put the food items out for you to be able to do that, but they did no more than the servers at Quiznos or Baja Fresh, who keep the salsa & condiment bar stocked with fixings.
All the cashier did was ring up your transaction, just like the cashiers at every other Fast Food establishment.
All the cook did was cook/heat up your food, and while he did so right there in front of you, he did nothing more than the guy at The Steak Escape who cooks your cheesesteak sandwich right in front of you.
Do you leave a Tip at Quiznos, Baja Fresh, or The Steak Escape? I don't. Why should I?
Now don't get me wrong. It's not that I don't believe in Tipping, because I do IF the service warrants it.
The waitress at Leroys? She takes my order, brings me coffee, refills my cup, brings me more creamer if I run out, and checks if I need anything, homemade salsa or marmalade, napkins, etc. She takes care of me. She works for, earns, and deserves her tip.
But the guys at Mongolian BBQ? What did they do to earn a Tip? What did they do above and beyond every other Fast Food place that makes them so special that they deserve a Tip? Merely working in the service industry does not warrant being Tipped. Just because you made my lunch does not warrant being Tipped. In my opinion if you want a Tip, you have to earn it.
Now maybe I'm wrong here, but if so, explain how.
Explain to me why I should leave a Tip at Mongolian BBQ, but not at Quiznos, The Steak Escape, and Baja Fresh?
What about McDonalds? Shouldn't I Tip them? Because let's be honest here, the staff at McDonalds do more to enhance my dining experience than the staff at my local Mongolian BBQ.
McDonalds provide me with a clean restroom, Mongolian BBQ doesn't.
McDonalds prepare my food for me. I have to do that myself at Mongolian BBQ.
McDonalds provide me with tables & chairs, which they keep clean; Mongolian BBQ don't.
McDonalds provide my kids with a place to play so I can relax and begin slipping into a food coma. Mongolian BBQ don't do that.
What does Mongolian BBQ do that their staff deserve to be Tipped?
Monday, November 15, 2010
Canceling DISH TV
A couple of weeks ago we moved and canceled our cable TV service (Dish TV), which we had originally subscribed to as part of a package deal through our phone company ( AT&T).
When I called Dish earlier this month and told the rep we were moving he was quite persistent about getting the service transferred to our new location, but I was equally persistent about canceling. Finally he said he would mail some boxes for us to pack our Dish equipment into, boxes that we would use to mail the Dish equipment back to them. The Rep took down our new address, a couple of weeks went by, but no boxes arrived.
Today I called Dish back to find out where the boxes were, and right from the start it was obvious there would be problems.
"Thank you for calling Dish Network. If you are an existing customer or have technical issues, press 1. For all other inquiries, press 2. To repeat this Menu Press * ."
Yep, that was all the options I had.
So...2...I guess.
"Please wait while we direct your call to the agent who can best assist you."
Tum te tum te tum.
"Thank you for calling AT&T. Is the number you're calling about xxx-xxx-xxxx (my new home phone number)?" asked the automated system.
AT&T? WTF? Er..."No!"
"Please enter or say your 10-digit phone number associated with your account."
Rather than confuse the voice recognition program with my Aussie accent I keyed in our old phone number.
"Thank you. I'll just look that up."
Queue in little, clicking, typing-type sounds meant to make us think the computer is actually typing on a keyboard.
"Okay. Now in a few words, please tell me the reason why you're calling. For example, to add Caller ID service to your account, you could say 'Add service'."
I spoke into my phone as clearly as I could - DISH TV
"Thank you. Please wait while we direct your call to the agent who can best assist you."
Tum te tum te tum.
"Thank you for calling Dish Network. If you are an existing customer or have technical issues, press 1. For all other inquiries, press 2. To repeat this Menu Press * ."
o_O
I guess it's 1 then.
"Please wait while we direct your call to the agent who can best assist you."
Tum te tum te tum.
"Thank you for calling AT&T. Is the number you're calling about xxx-xxx-xxxx (my new home phone number)."
What? Again??? "NO!"
"Please enter or say your 10-digit phone number associated with your account."
Grr.
I keyed in our old number, again, queue in more clicking, typing sounds, and finally a woman answered...just as my In-laws chose to call. So as the Rep was trying to talk to me my Call Waiting was beeping and obliterating her every other word. Eventually we confirmed that she couldn't help me because she was with Sales and I needed Equipment Returns. She offered to transfer me and I explained that I'd been back & forth a couple of times so could she please make sure I got to the correct department.
I guess that was the wrong thing to say.
"Thank you for calling Dish Network. If you are an existing customer or have technical issues, press 1. For all other inquiries, press 2. To repeat this Menu Press * ."
I think I pressed 1 again, I forget now. My brain is trying to repress this period of my life. Finally I managed to speak to another Rep, this one a man with an Indian accent, who began every sentence with "I apologize...".
(If your Rep has a foreign accent, constantly apologizes, and uses phrases like "Let me access my resources" chances are you're dealing with someone who probably cannot help you, but will merely "refer your issue to the research department".)
I gave this fellow the benefit of the doubt, and my old phone number, at which point he accessed his resources to find my account, then told me I needed to wait 7-10 business days for the Return boxes to arrive.
I told him it had already been 7-10 business days and we still hadn't received the boxes. He apologized (yet again) then said he would have new Return boxes mailed "to your address..." at which point he began to recite my old address.
"No! That's my old address." He ignored me and continued to recite my old address. "That's my old address!" I said, shouting him down. "We moved. We're not there any more."
He apologized, again, and that was it. "Just transfer me to your supervisor," I told him. "All you can do is apologize! You can't help me so transfer me to your supervisor."
"I apologize..."
"Supervisor!"
Hold music came on the line. Hold music, with a Hindi influence. I was pretty sure I could hear a sitar strumming away. Interesting. I was on hold for several minutes and Liz said, "they're not picking up. They want you to hang up."
"I'm not hanging up," I told her, and that's when my phone beeped. I looked at the screen and saw 'Call Ended'. They had hung up on me.
Bastiches.
I guess it's time to take a trip to the old place to see if there are a couple of Return boxes waiting for me there, because apparently if you don't return their equipment they like to charge you for it, and that stuff ain't cheap.
When I called Dish earlier this month and told the rep we were moving he was quite persistent about getting the service transferred to our new location, but I was equally persistent about canceling. Finally he said he would mail some boxes for us to pack our Dish equipment into, boxes that we would use to mail the Dish equipment back to them. The Rep took down our new address, a couple of weeks went by, but no boxes arrived.
Today I called Dish back to find out where the boxes were, and right from the start it was obvious there would be problems.
"Thank you for calling Dish Network. If you are an existing customer or have technical issues, press 1. For all other inquiries, press 2. To repeat this Menu Press * ."
Yep, that was all the options I had.
So...2...I guess.
"Please wait while we direct your call to the agent who can best assist you."
Tum te tum te tum.
"Thank you for calling AT&T. Is the number you're calling about xxx-xxx-xxxx (my new home phone number)?" asked the automated system.
AT&T? WTF? Er..."No!"
"Please enter or say your 10-digit phone number associated with your account."
Rather than confuse the voice recognition program with my Aussie accent I keyed in our old phone number.
"Thank you. I'll just look that up."
Queue in little, clicking, typing-type sounds meant to make us think the computer is actually typing on a keyboard.
"Okay. Now in a few words, please tell me the reason why you're calling. For example, to add Caller ID service to your account, you could say 'Add service'."
I spoke into my phone as clearly as I could - DISH TV
"Thank you. Please wait while we direct your call to the agent who can best assist you."
Tum te tum te tum.
"Thank you for calling Dish Network. If you are an existing customer or have technical issues, press 1. For all other inquiries, press 2. To repeat this Menu Press * ."
o_O
I guess it's 1 then.
"Please wait while we direct your call to the agent who can best assist you."
Tum te tum te tum.
"Thank you for calling AT&T. Is the number you're calling about xxx-xxx-xxxx (my new home phone number)."
What? Again??? "NO!"
"Please enter or say your 10-digit phone number associated with your account."
Grr.
I keyed in our old number, again, queue in more clicking, typing sounds, and finally a woman answered...just as my In-laws chose to call. So as the Rep was trying to talk to me my Call Waiting was beeping and obliterating her every other word. Eventually we confirmed that she couldn't help me because she was with Sales and I needed Equipment Returns. She offered to transfer me and I explained that I'd been back & forth a couple of times so could she please make sure I got to the correct department.
I guess that was the wrong thing to say.
"Thank you for calling Dish Network. If you are an existing customer or have technical issues, press 1. For all other inquiries, press 2. To repeat this Menu Press * ."
I think I pressed 1 again, I forget now. My brain is trying to repress this period of my life. Finally I managed to speak to another Rep, this one a man with an Indian accent, who began every sentence with "I apologize...".
(If your Rep has a foreign accent, constantly apologizes, and uses phrases like "Let me access my resources" chances are you're dealing with someone who probably cannot help you, but will merely "refer your issue to the research department".)
I gave this fellow the benefit of the doubt, and my old phone number, at which point he accessed his resources to find my account, then told me I needed to wait 7-10 business days for the Return boxes to arrive.
I told him it had already been 7-10 business days and we still hadn't received the boxes. He apologized (yet again) then said he would have new Return boxes mailed "to your address..." at which point he began to recite my old address.
"No! That's my old address." He ignored me and continued to recite my old address. "That's my old address!" I said, shouting him down. "We moved. We're not there any more."
He apologized, again, and that was it. "Just transfer me to your supervisor," I told him. "All you can do is apologize! You can't help me so transfer me to your supervisor."
"I apologize..."
"Supervisor!"
Hold music came on the line. Hold music, with a Hindi influence. I was pretty sure I could hear a sitar strumming away. Interesting. I was on hold for several minutes and Liz said, "they're not picking up. They want you to hang up."
"I'm not hanging up," I told her, and that's when my phone beeped. I looked at the screen and saw 'Call Ended'. They had hung up on me.
Bastiches.
I guess it's time to take a trip to the old place to see if there are a couple of Return boxes waiting for me there, because apparently if you don't return their equipment they like to charge you for it, and that stuff ain't cheap.
Wednesday, August 04, 2010
Greed and Dishonesty
One of our favorite places to visit, especially during the hotter weather, are the self-serve, Soft-Serve Yogurt Houses, where you get to create your own Soft-Serve Yogurt Sundae with as much or as little Yogurt and as many toppings as you'd like, within reason of course.
The way these places work is you grab yourself a tub, fill it with the yogurt (or don't, as in don't fill it) of your choice, or yogurts if you want to mix flavors. You add some toppings - or not; it's your choice - then the clerk weighs your sundae because you pay per ounce, so the more you cram into your tub, the heavier it is, and the more you pay. Quite fair, in my opinion. Just want a little? Pay a little. Want to pig out? Then you'll pay for it, now and later.
We always get the smaller of the two tubs which might hold a pint of yogurt if you filled it, but we never do. (The bigger tub is probably around 50% larger than the smaller one.). Sometimes I've filled my tub a little over halfway but for the most part we'll put a couple of coils of yogurt in the bottom then throw a few toppings on, and between the four of us we'll usually pay around $6-$8.
We frequently see other patrons also taking the smaller tub, but unlike us they'll fill it almost to the top with yogurt then hit the toppings bar and by the time they've finished you'd think there had been an earthquake. They've left so little room for toppings, but are so determined to get toppings on and, I guess, "get their moneys worth" that they'll scoop on the toppings only to have them fall off every which way (but loose. Great movie, by the way; one of my favorites). So they fill their small tub up with yogurt until it's almost overflowing, then add toppings until it is...and why are we always surprised when their single tub of yogurt rings up for as much as the four of ours?
You look at their concoction and wonder why they don't just take a big tub and half fill it instead. They'd still pay the same price for the same amount of yogurt and toppings but it wouldn't be spilling out all over the place. Except you also know that if they did take the bigger tub they'd still do exactly the same thing. So they either have no self-control - which is doubtful or they would use the bigger tub - or their greed has them convinced that by overloading their smaller tub they're "sticking it to the man"
"You're not ripping me off, Mr. Yogurt-Man! I'm filling my tub to the top. You hear me, Mr. Yogurt-Man? To. The. Top! Yeah!"
The cafeteria at my work has a salad bar. It's the kind where you get your own box and make your own salad, and like the Yogurt Houses you used to have to pay for however much you took.
But then Management made a change and suddenly a small carton of salad was just $4 while a larger carton was $6, for as much salad as you can cram into it, within reason of course. But 'reason' is overrated because just as greedy people overload their yogurt tubs, my greedy coworkers would likewise fill their salad carton so full that the cashier couldn't close the tabs on top. It was understood that the tabs needed to close or you'd pay extra but I guess some of coworkers still filled their carton To. The. Top! By which I mean over-filled it so the tabs couldn't close.
So Management replaced the cartons with clear plastic boxes. The kind with a hinge, with equal sized top & bottom (or is it bottom & top?) It doesn't matter because whichever way you flip it your box still looks the same, with the same sized bottom and the same sized top. The price is also the same but if you figure you now get less salad for the same price because the 'top' is now just halfway up the container, you'd be right.
I mentioned that to my cashier when I got my salad today, that the box is smaller now.
"No, it's the same size," she said.
I explained to her that we couldn't fill it like we could with the old cartons and that's when I learned of my greedy & dishonest coworkers who tried to "stick it to the man" and deliberately over-filled their cartons. And when those greedy, dishonest people came in and saw their cartons had been replaced by plastic containers, and they realized they couldn't get as much salad as before, that "the man was ripping them off!" do you think they still got a salad? Probably not; they probably went somewhere else.
In the short term they might have "won". They got a few extra pieces of lettuce or tomato at no additional cost, but in the long term they will never see deals like that $4 salad. Their own greed has made sure of that. They still lose, just like we all do.
He who dies with the most toys...still dies. - Random T. Shirt
The way these places work is you grab yourself a tub, fill it with the yogurt (or don't, as in don't fill it) of your choice, or yogurts if you want to mix flavors. You add some toppings - or not; it's your choice - then the clerk weighs your sundae because you pay per ounce, so the more you cram into your tub, the heavier it is, and the more you pay. Quite fair, in my opinion. Just want a little? Pay a little. Want to pig out? Then you'll pay for it, now and later.
We always get the smaller of the two tubs which might hold a pint of yogurt if you filled it, but we never do. (The bigger tub is probably around 50% larger than the smaller one.). Sometimes I've filled my tub a little over halfway but for the most part we'll put a couple of coils of yogurt in the bottom then throw a few toppings on, and between the four of us we'll usually pay around $6-$8.
We frequently see other patrons also taking the smaller tub, but unlike us they'll fill it almost to the top with yogurt then hit the toppings bar and by the time they've finished you'd think there had been an earthquake. They've left so little room for toppings, but are so determined to get toppings on and, I guess, "get their moneys worth" that they'll scoop on the toppings only to have them fall off every which way (but loose. Great movie, by the way; one of my favorites). So they fill their small tub up with yogurt until it's almost overflowing, then add toppings until it is...and why are we always surprised when their single tub of yogurt rings up for as much as the four of ours?
You look at their concoction and wonder why they don't just take a big tub and half fill it instead. They'd still pay the same price for the same amount of yogurt and toppings but it wouldn't be spilling out all over the place. Except you also know that if they did take the bigger tub they'd still do exactly the same thing. So they either have no self-control - which is doubtful or they would use the bigger tub - or their greed has them convinced that by overloading their smaller tub they're "sticking it to the man"
"You're not ripping me off, Mr. Yogurt-Man! I'm filling my tub to the top. You hear me, Mr. Yogurt-Man? To. The. Top! Yeah!"
The cafeteria at my work has a salad bar. It's the kind where you get your own box and make your own salad, and like the Yogurt Houses you used to have to pay for however much you took.
But then Management made a change and suddenly a small carton of salad was just $4 while a larger carton was $6, for as much salad as you can cram into it, within reason of course. But 'reason' is overrated because just as greedy people overload their yogurt tubs, my greedy coworkers would likewise fill their salad carton so full that the cashier couldn't close the tabs on top. It was understood that the tabs needed to close or you'd pay extra but I guess some of coworkers still filled their carton To. The. Top! By which I mean over-filled it so the tabs couldn't close.
So Management replaced the cartons with clear plastic boxes. The kind with a hinge, with equal sized top & bottom (or is it bottom & top?) It doesn't matter because whichever way you flip it your box still looks the same, with the same sized bottom and the same sized top. The price is also the same but if you figure you now get less salad for the same price because the 'top' is now just halfway up the container, you'd be right.
I mentioned that to my cashier when I got my salad today, that the box is smaller now.
"No, it's the same size," she said.
I explained to her that we couldn't fill it like we could with the old cartons and that's when I learned of my greedy & dishonest coworkers who tried to "stick it to the man" and deliberately over-filled their cartons. And when those greedy, dishonest people came in and saw their cartons had been replaced by plastic containers, and they realized they couldn't get as much salad as before, that "the man was ripping them off!" do you think they still got a salad? Probably not; they probably went somewhere else.
In the short term they might have "won". They got a few extra pieces of lettuce or tomato at no additional cost, but in the long term they will never see deals like that $4 salad. Their own greed has made sure of that. They still lose, just like we all do.
He who dies with the most toys...still dies. - Random T. Shirt
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Rant against MyPoints
followed by vindication.
MyPoints, for those who may not be aware, is an online spam program where you sign up to get spammed and you click the links in the emails for points and after clicking a bazillion links you finally earn enough points to get a $5 Toys 'r' Us gift card. (Actually it's not that many emails, and the rewards are pretty decent, but unless you shop online at their affiliate's sites don't expect to be getting a gift card every week, or every other week, for that matter.)
I've been a MyPoints Member for quite a few years now (maybe 8-10?) and I've happily clicked through their emails and slowly accrued my MyPoints...which the wife cashes in for Gift Cards and spends, all without my knowledge. Meanwhile I continue to happily click through their emails and accrue more MyPoints, and so on. The wife also has a MyPoints account and she probably signed our son up, too. Nothing wrong with that, except there's probably an age requirement to be a MyPoints Member. Meh.
Last this week I clicked one of the MyPoints emails in my Inbox and as the page loaded I returned to the MyPoints folder, deleted the first email then clicked the link in the second. When the 'offer' pages loaded, instead of seeing their 'offer' I was presented with a message that said "Account closed due to violation of Terms of Service".
Huh?
Ok, I knew what that meant, but still. Huh? What violation? What did I do that violated their Terms of Service?
So I emailed them asking "What did I do?", and the response I got back appeared to be a simple Copy & Paste from the company manual, listed several possible ways to violate their Terms of Service, and didn't really tell me what I did wrong.
So I emailed them again and said, "Dude! Skip the copy & paste and just tell me what I did wrong."
This time they replied and said, "Dude! Are you fucking stupid or what? You got multiple accounts, and that's some bogus shit, dude!"
Ok, so they didn't say that exactly, but that was the gist of what they said.
So I emailed them back, again, and said, "Dude! WTF? Multiple accounts, dude? What multiple accounts?"
Ok, so I didn't say that either, but I did mention that HowManyOfMe.com can find almost 100 people with my name, 20 in California alone, and that when I tried to become a member at the downtown L.A. Library I had to use my full name because there were two people with my name already in the system. And I had to use my full middle name - not just middle initial - because the 'me' who had used his middle initial (to differentiate from the first 'me' ) also had the same middle initial as me! (Bizarre or what?)
I added that not only did I know of at least 5 people with my name in the Greater Los Angeles area, but that my son and I also share the same name (as we do with my father, his father, my great grandfather, and so on, for at least 10 generations as far as I know) and my son still lives at home (he's still a bit young to think of moving out) and that he probably has a MyPoints account just as my wife and I do. So if you're claiming I have multiple accounts because you're seeing two MyPoints accounts with the same name at the same address, I concluded, that would be me and my son.
I never heard back from them, but this morning I had a couple of MyPoints emails in my InBox. They were the same as all the other MyPoints offers I've received over the years. When I clicked them the page with the offer came up, rather than an Alert message that my account had been closed due to violation of Terms of Service.
Mondo radical, dude! Score one for the little guy!
MyPoints, for those who may not be aware, is an online spam program where you sign up to get spammed and you click the links in the emails for points and after clicking a bazillion links you finally earn enough points to get a $5 Toys 'r' Us gift card. (Actually it's not that many emails, and the rewards are pretty decent, but unless you shop online at their affiliate's sites don't expect to be getting a gift card every week, or every other week, for that matter.)
I've been a MyPoints Member for quite a few years now (maybe 8-10?) and I've happily clicked through their emails and slowly accrued my MyPoints...which the wife cashes in for Gift Cards and spends, all without my knowledge. Meanwhile I continue to happily click through their emails and accrue more MyPoints, and so on. The wife also has a MyPoints account and she probably signed our son up, too. Nothing wrong with that, except there's probably an age requirement to be a MyPoints Member. Meh.
Last this week I clicked one of the MyPoints emails in my Inbox and as the page loaded I returned to the MyPoints folder, deleted the first email then clicked the link in the second. When the 'offer' pages loaded, instead of seeing their 'offer' I was presented with a message that said "Account closed due to violation of Terms of Service".
Huh?
Ok, I knew what that meant, but still. Huh? What violation? What did I do that violated their Terms of Service?
So I emailed them asking "What did I do?", and the response I got back appeared to be a simple Copy & Paste from the company manual, listed several possible ways to violate their Terms of Service, and didn't really tell me what I did wrong.
So I emailed them again and said, "Dude! Skip the copy & paste and just tell me what I did wrong."
This time they replied and said, "Dude! Are you fucking stupid or what? You got multiple accounts, and that's some bogus shit, dude!"
Ok, so they didn't say that exactly, but that was the gist of what they said.
So I emailed them back, again, and said, "Dude! WTF? Multiple accounts, dude? What multiple accounts?"
Ok, so I didn't say that either, but I did mention that HowManyOfMe.com can find almost 100 people with my name, 20 in California alone, and that when I tried to become a member at the downtown L.A. Library I had to use my full name because there were two people with my name already in the system. And I had to use my full middle name - not just middle initial - because the 'me' who had used his middle initial (to differentiate from the first 'me' ) also had the same middle initial as me! (Bizarre or what?)
I added that not only did I know of at least 5 people with my name in the Greater Los Angeles area, but that my son and I also share the same name (as we do with my father, his father, my great grandfather, and so on, for at least 10 generations as far as I know) and my son still lives at home (he's still a bit young to think of moving out) and that he probably has a MyPoints account just as my wife and I do. So if you're claiming I have multiple accounts because you're seeing two MyPoints accounts with the same name at the same address, I concluded, that would be me and my son.
I never heard back from them, but this morning I had a couple of MyPoints emails in my InBox. They were the same as all the other MyPoints offers I've received over the years. When I clicked them the page with the offer came up, rather than an Alert message that my account had been closed due to violation of Terms of Service.
Mondo radical, dude! Score one for the little guy!
Monday, March 15, 2010
Signs you work for Initech
I've mentioned before that I'm in charge of the office coffee club because no other schmuck will take it off my hands, and I need coffee, and as much as I like Soy Lattes I'm not doing Starbucks every day.
So I'm in the breakroom this morning and an altruistic coworker presents to me what he thinks is a great idea.
We should turn off the Keurig coffee machine on Friday afternoon so it's not On all weekend, he says to me.
That's not a bad idea. I mean it's just one little machine keeping about a quart of water hot so when someone wants a cup of coffee it's ready, but I'm sure there's some cost saving if it were turned off over the weekend instead of being left on. A minimal cost saving, but a saving nonetheless.
I also start work early. I mean seriously early. Like OMFG o'clock. So I could turn the machine back on first thing Monday morning when I get in giving the water inside time to heat up and be ready by the time the rest of the riffraff get in, and so...
Yeah, that's a good idea, I tell him, before adding, who's going to turn it off on Friday?
See because I get in at OMFG o'clock (what can I say? That amuses me. Yeah, I'm a little juvenile at times) I also leave early in the afternoon, so I can't turn the machine off when I leave or I'd be depriving some of my caffeine-addicted coworkers of their coffee. Bad things happen when people who need caffeine don't get it, and I'm not going to be responsible for that, so it's only natural that I'd ask him who would turn the machine off.
And he gives me a look not unlike a kicked puppy, which I think is a little unfair. He's the one who didn't think his idea all the way through to the "Who would do this?" stage. Why does that make me the bad guy for pointing it out?
If anything that was his queue to step up to the plate and say "Why! I shall turn it off myself!" but he didn't do that. So he has a half-arsed idea, that he never thought through, and which he's not prepared to put into action himself, but I'm the bad guy for calling him on it.
That's not the Initech moment, which if you need it pointed out is the company Peter worked for (or didn't work for, depending how you look at it) in the movie "Office Space".
On Friday I completed & submitted my electronic Time Sheet (like a good little Peon). This morning the supervisor who I helped last week (who is a supervisor but not my supervisor) is apparently reviewing my Time Sheet because she asks me to recall it because I didn't charge any time to her projects.
So I recall my Time Sheet, change the numbers around to bill some time to her projects (instead of it all being charged to the projects on which I normally work), re-Submit it, then notice I have a new email. It's from my Supervisor. As in my actual Supervisor.
It's short, simple, and to the point.
"Please submit your Time Sheet."
You have got to be fucking kidding me!
Now I actually have a decent relationship with my real supervisor so I fire off an email to him, explain the situation, and tell him I've just re-submitted it. Then I add:
"I'm glad I'm learning new opportunities but situations like these make me feel like I'm in the movie "Office Space" :P
Yeah, I actually emailed that, including the :P smiley.
"Just another manic Monday." - The Bangles.
So I'm in the breakroom this morning and an altruistic coworker presents to me what he thinks is a great idea.
We should turn off the Keurig coffee machine on Friday afternoon so it's not On all weekend, he says to me.
That's not a bad idea. I mean it's just one little machine keeping about a quart of water hot so when someone wants a cup of coffee it's ready, but I'm sure there's some cost saving if it were turned off over the weekend instead of being left on. A minimal cost saving, but a saving nonetheless.
I also start work early. I mean seriously early. Like OMFG o'clock. So I could turn the machine back on first thing Monday morning when I get in giving the water inside time to heat up and be ready by the time the rest of the riffraff get in, and so...
Yeah, that's a good idea, I tell him, before adding, who's going to turn it off on Friday?
See because I get in at OMFG o'clock (what can I say? That amuses me. Yeah, I'm a little juvenile at times) I also leave early in the afternoon, so I can't turn the machine off when I leave or I'd be depriving some of my caffeine-addicted coworkers of their coffee. Bad things happen when people who need caffeine don't get it, and I'm not going to be responsible for that, so it's only natural that I'd ask him who would turn the machine off.
And he gives me a look not unlike a kicked puppy, which I think is a little unfair. He's the one who didn't think his idea all the way through to the "Who would do this?" stage. Why does that make me the bad guy for pointing it out?
If anything that was his queue to step up to the plate and say "Why! I shall turn it off myself!" but he didn't do that. So he has a half-arsed idea, that he never thought through, and which he's not prepared to put into action himself, but I'm the bad guy for calling him on it.
That's not the Initech moment, which if you need it pointed out is the company Peter worked for (or didn't work for, depending how you look at it) in the movie "Office Space".
On Friday I completed & submitted my electronic Time Sheet (like a good little Peon). This morning the supervisor who I helped last week (who is a supervisor but not my supervisor) is apparently reviewing my Time Sheet because she asks me to recall it because I didn't charge any time to her projects.
So I recall my Time Sheet, change the numbers around to bill some time to her projects (instead of it all being charged to the projects on which I normally work), re-Submit it, then notice I have a new email. It's from my Supervisor. As in my actual Supervisor.
It's short, simple, and to the point.
"Please submit your Time Sheet."
You have got to be fucking kidding me!
Now I actually have a decent relationship with my real supervisor so I fire off an email to him, explain the situation, and tell him I've just re-submitted it. Then I add:
"I'm glad I'm learning new opportunities but situations like these make me feel like I'm in the movie "Office Space" :P
Yeah, I actually emailed that, including the :P smiley.
"Just another manic Monday." - The Bangles.
Monday, January 25, 2010
The Deadmines PUG from Hell
I wanted to have a go at Tanking the lower level Instances to see what I'd missed so I rolled a Draenei Pally (because Draenei and BElfs get a lot more Green gear from low level quests). I couldn't use the LFD tool until 15 but I waited until 16 (when I got Hand of Reckoning) to join the queue for RFC. After all, what good is a Tank without an actual Taunt ability, right?
RFC was a cinch, mostly because level 15 characters are starting to get a little too high for it and we were all 16 & up (inc. a 20 Warrior who signed up for DPS but acted like he was a Tank). Despite being a little on the high side for RFC I still got a reasonably nice blue 1H sword which was an upgrade even over my 2H weapon.
With RFC out of the way I hit Westfall in preparation for Tanking Deadmines. I could have just gone straight in via the LFD tool but I wanted the Van Cleef quest for the reward. (I also needed to stop at Stormwind to learn how to wield 1H Swords ;)
By the time I finally had the mission to kill Van Cleef I was level 18, which is a reasonable level to tackle Deadmines. But after signing up and volunteering to Tank I didn't get in straight away, and that was not something to which I had become accustomed. Then when I did get into a group one of the DPS declined the Run so we went back to the head of the queue.
Finally we picked up another DPSer and we were in. Myself, a 20 Warlock (in Heirloom gear), a Druid Healer, a Mage (calling himself Evilcaster), and a Rogue.
The Warlock was, to be brutally honest, an arse. And yet he was in Heirloom gear so he clearly should have known better.
While I was the designated Tank and thus should have been initiating the Pulls, the Warlock was doing his own thing and grabbing Aggro on multiple Miners. I was fighting to grab Aggro back when the inevitable happened. The Warlock drew too many Miners, along with a couple of Elite Defias Mobs, and we Wiped.
In Rhahk'zor's room before I could pull the Warlock sic'd his Voidwalker onto one of the Defias guards. I picked up Aggro on Rhahk and we managed to down the Ogre boss but it was a close fight. The Warlock then went missing. Not AFK, I mean he ran off. When he returned he claimed he'd gone to Solo the Pat that comes after Rhahk is defeated. By now that should have been more than enough signs and yet we continued on.
In the Smelting room we fought our way down the ramp while I fought the Warlock for Aggro. At the bottom of the Ramp I tried to carefully pull the nearby Goblins while the Warlock did his own thing, which meant running off and Aggroing the entire room.
"What the hell is he doing?" I thought to myself as he died, the Goblins swarmed us, and we Wiped again.
And then it appeared in Party Chat.
LEEERRROOOOOYYY JEEEEENKINNNNNSSSS!!!!
DAMN MAN THAT SHIT WAS TIGHT!!!
Yes, he actually typed that.
I got the Spirit Release and realized the 'Lock had Soulstoned me. And if I'd been in a better spot we might have been okay, but no. I'd tried to save the day and was in a bad spot to SS Rez.
After waiting for the Goblins to rearrange themselves I managed to Rez w/o attracting attention, but as I tried to Rez the Druid a Goblin spied me, summoned his little robot helper, and attacked. I took him down and was slowly working on his Robot when another Goblin heard the commotion and joined the fray, summoning a Robot of his own. I fought valiantly but to no avail and died a second time, and this time had no choice but to Release and run back from the GY.
On the way back in to the Instance I right-clicked the Warlock's profile and selected "Vote to Kick", and the message popped up "You are dead."
Crap. And because I'd SS Rez'd then died a second time, by the time I got back inside the group were some distance ahead of me.
Again I right-clicked the 'Lock and selected "Vote to Kick".
"Not in combat."
WTF???
I selected the Warlock and sure enough, he was targeting a Goblin. I made it back to the group as they finished off Gilnid and the Goblins. The door behind him opened and the 'Lock was the first player through. This time I was not surprised to see him round up a whole mess of Miners and Defias and cause yet another wipe, and just like that I was dead again.
As we ran back to the Instance our number was suddenly reduced to four and I could not believe my eyes. After causing multiple wipes the 'Lock had dropped group.
What an arse!
On the plus side I was now Party Leader. Awesome. I know Deadmines like the back of my hand. I'm Tank AND Party Leader. There's only four of us but I was pretty sure we could finish this. (In retrospect I should have re-entered us into the queue and picked up another DPS, but I did not do that. It's a learning experience though, right?)
I immediately typed in chat, "Thank heavens he's gone, because as soon as we were in I was going to Vote to Kick him!"
LOL was the only reply, from Evilcaster no less, who would actually prove to be a decent Mage when not being eclipsed by an idiot 'Lock.
The Druid and the Rogue remained silent, at least until the Rogue complained about her armor and weapons being broken. This was understandable because for some reason, every single time she Rez'd, she had Resurrection Sickness. It was only on our last Wipe that I realized she was not running back into the Instance to Rez, but Spirit Rezzing after each death. Oy vey!
Then when she ran to loot Smite's Treasure Chest not once but twice (after I Rez'd her and in spite of my saying "Wait!"), I realized we were running with a very young player or someone on their first Alliance toon...or both.
On the Rogue's second death the Mage followed the plan that I'd already announced, being Sheep one of the Guards and keep it Sheeped while we killed the second guard, then Smite, then the Sheep.
I Rezzed the Rogue yet again and seeing her run immediately to Smite's Chest for a third time explained that it was Smite's chest, not ours, we couldn't loot it. She was not happy.
We slowly killed our way up the ship and near the top, with the Rouge dead yet again (this time having fallen off the gangway and been killed by a Troll, or so she said), I saw Capt. Greenskin and his posse stroll past above us, stop, then start running back to the ramp down to our level.
"Follow me!" I typed (and thank heavens I'm a proficient typist. "Quick! Onto the wheel!" and I ran to the paddle wheel and leaped up onto it.
The Druid made it on with me but the Mage was a little slow. After killing him Capt. Greenskin's crew pursued us to the wheel and I watched, puzzled, as they stood on the gangway for several seconds and then...the Druid died. Just like that. I thought I saw a puff of flame on Greenskin as the Druid died, and with that Greenskin & his crew ran back to the top deck and continued patrolling.
Still not yet back the Rogue announced that she was going to repair her gear (which I'm pretty sure was almost all Red by now) while I rez'd the Druid & Mage. We established a plan to take out Greenskin, and after clearing the final ramp ran back to Rez the Rogue who had died yet again while trying to stealth in past a Pat.
We returned to the ship, made our way back up to the top, and following our strategy Capt. Greenskin & his posse died without a hitch. Now all that stood between us, victory, and that Deadmines Achievement was Van Cleef.
Knowing he comes with two Mobs (and respawns two more at 50%) I outlined our strategy then pulled him, and things were actually looking good right up until the Druid ran out of Mana and the Heals stopped coming. I died, then the Druid died, then the Rogue dried. With Van Cleef and one Mob left the Mage gave it all he had but it just wasn't enough. Van Cleef had less than 100hp left when the Mage finally died. (I really should have picked up a 3rd DPS, so being Party Leader this defeat was nobody's fault but my own.)
After running back to the Instance and seeing full respawns I realized it was time to finally call it quits, and when I told the other three I had to leave it seemed I was simply expressing what everyone was feeling and the group dissolved.
Does it change my mind about Tanking or cross-server PUGs and the LFD Tool? Hell no. We had one idiot griefer (but we moved past him) and one newbie (as opposed to a Noob!) who (I hope) learned from his/her experience with us, and yes, I spent a good part of my evening in Deadmines and didn't down Van Cleef, but I still had a good time (and learned a few things, too).
In the end I think this sums up PUGs. Some of them are great, some end in disaster, and some are just business as usual; successful, but not memorable. Sure, the arse hats are memorable and make you fear the PUG, but they're also few & far between, and if you let them keep you from PUGing Instances you're really only hurting yourself. After all, it's your $15. Why let someone else control your game?
RFC was a cinch, mostly because level 15 characters are starting to get a little too high for it and we were all 16 & up (inc. a 20 Warrior who signed up for DPS but acted like he was a Tank). Despite being a little on the high side for RFC I still got a reasonably nice blue 1H sword which was an upgrade even over my 2H weapon.
With RFC out of the way I hit Westfall in preparation for Tanking Deadmines. I could have just gone straight in via the LFD tool but I wanted the Van Cleef quest for the reward. (I also needed to stop at Stormwind to learn how to wield 1H Swords ;)
By the time I finally had the mission to kill Van Cleef I was level 18, which is a reasonable level to tackle Deadmines. But after signing up and volunteering to Tank I didn't get in straight away, and that was not something to which I had become accustomed. Then when I did get into a group one of the DPS declined the Run so we went back to the head of the queue.
Finally we picked up another DPSer and we were in. Myself, a 20 Warlock (in Heirloom gear), a Druid Healer, a Mage (calling himself Evilcaster), and a Rogue.
The Warlock was, to be brutally honest, an arse. And yet he was in Heirloom gear so he clearly should have known better.
While I was the designated Tank and thus should have been initiating the Pulls, the Warlock was doing his own thing and grabbing Aggro on multiple Miners. I was fighting to grab Aggro back when the inevitable happened. The Warlock drew too many Miners, along with a couple of Elite Defias Mobs, and we Wiped.
In Rhahk'zor's room before I could pull the Warlock sic'd his Voidwalker onto one of the Defias guards. I picked up Aggro on Rhahk and we managed to down the Ogre boss but it was a close fight. The Warlock then went missing. Not AFK, I mean he ran off. When he returned he claimed he'd gone to Solo the Pat that comes after Rhahk is defeated. By now that should have been more than enough signs and yet we continued on.
In the Smelting room we fought our way down the ramp while I fought the Warlock for Aggro. At the bottom of the Ramp I tried to carefully pull the nearby Goblins while the Warlock did his own thing, which meant running off and Aggroing the entire room.
"What the hell is he doing?" I thought to myself as he died, the Goblins swarmed us, and we Wiped again.
And then it appeared in Party Chat.
LEEERRROOOOOYYY JEEEEENKINNNNNSSSS!!!!
DAMN MAN THAT SHIT WAS TIGHT!!!
Yes, he actually typed that.
I got the Spirit Release and realized the 'Lock had Soulstoned me. And if I'd been in a better spot we might have been okay, but no. I'd tried to save the day and was in a bad spot to SS Rez.
After waiting for the Goblins to rearrange themselves I managed to Rez w/o attracting attention, but as I tried to Rez the Druid a Goblin spied me, summoned his little robot helper, and attacked. I took him down and was slowly working on his Robot when another Goblin heard the commotion and joined the fray, summoning a Robot of his own. I fought valiantly but to no avail and died a second time, and this time had no choice but to Release and run back from the GY.
On the way back in to the Instance I right-clicked the Warlock's profile and selected "Vote to Kick", and the message popped up "You are dead."
Crap. And because I'd SS Rez'd then died a second time, by the time I got back inside the group were some distance ahead of me.
Again I right-clicked the 'Lock and selected "Vote to Kick".
"Not in combat."
WTF???
I selected the Warlock and sure enough, he was targeting a Goblin. I made it back to the group as they finished off Gilnid and the Goblins. The door behind him opened and the 'Lock was the first player through. This time I was not surprised to see him round up a whole mess of Miners and Defias and cause yet another wipe, and just like that I was dead again.
As we ran back to the Instance our number was suddenly reduced to four and I could not believe my eyes. After causing multiple wipes the 'Lock had dropped group.
What an arse!
On the plus side I was now Party Leader. Awesome. I know Deadmines like the back of my hand. I'm Tank AND Party Leader. There's only four of us but I was pretty sure we could finish this. (In retrospect I should have re-entered us into the queue and picked up another DPS, but I did not do that. It's a learning experience though, right?)
I immediately typed in chat, "Thank heavens he's gone, because as soon as we were in I was going to Vote to Kick him!"
LOL was the only reply, from Evilcaster no less, who would actually prove to be a decent Mage when not being eclipsed by an idiot 'Lock.
The Druid and the Rogue remained silent, at least until the Rogue complained about her armor and weapons being broken. This was understandable because for some reason, every single time she Rez'd, she had Resurrection Sickness. It was only on our last Wipe that I realized she was not running back into the Instance to Rez, but Spirit Rezzing after each death. Oy vey!
Then when she ran to loot Smite's Treasure Chest not once but twice (after I Rez'd her and in spite of my saying "Wait!"), I realized we were running with a very young player or someone on their first Alliance toon...or both.
On the Rogue's second death the Mage followed the plan that I'd already announced, being Sheep one of the Guards and keep it Sheeped while we killed the second guard, then Smite, then the Sheep.
I Rezzed the Rogue yet again and seeing her run immediately to Smite's Chest for a third time explained that it was Smite's chest, not ours, we couldn't loot it. She was not happy.
We slowly killed our way up the ship and near the top, with the Rouge dead yet again (this time having fallen off the gangway and been killed by a Troll, or so she said), I saw Capt. Greenskin and his posse stroll past above us, stop, then start running back to the ramp down to our level.
"Follow me!" I typed (and thank heavens I'm a proficient typist. "Quick! Onto the wheel!" and I ran to the paddle wheel and leaped up onto it.
The Druid made it on with me but the Mage was a little slow. After killing him Capt. Greenskin's crew pursued us to the wheel and I watched, puzzled, as they stood on the gangway for several seconds and then...the Druid died. Just like that. I thought I saw a puff of flame on Greenskin as the Druid died, and with that Greenskin & his crew ran back to the top deck and continued patrolling.
Still not yet back the Rogue announced that she was going to repair her gear (which I'm pretty sure was almost all Red by now) while I rez'd the Druid & Mage. We established a plan to take out Greenskin, and after clearing the final ramp ran back to Rez the Rogue who had died yet again while trying to stealth in past a Pat.
We returned to the ship, made our way back up to the top, and following our strategy Capt. Greenskin & his posse died without a hitch. Now all that stood between us, victory, and that Deadmines Achievement was Van Cleef.
Knowing he comes with two Mobs (and respawns two more at 50%) I outlined our strategy then pulled him, and things were actually looking good right up until the Druid ran out of Mana and the Heals stopped coming. I died, then the Druid died, then the Rogue dried. With Van Cleef and one Mob left the Mage gave it all he had but it just wasn't enough. Van Cleef had less than 100hp left when the Mage finally died. (I really should have picked up a 3rd DPS, so being Party Leader this defeat was nobody's fault but my own.)
After running back to the Instance and seeing full respawns I realized it was time to finally call it quits, and when I told the other three I had to leave it seemed I was simply expressing what everyone was feeling and the group dissolved.
Does it change my mind about Tanking or cross-server PUGs and the LFD Tool? Hell no. We had one idiot griefer (but we moved past him) and one newbie (as opposed to a Noob!) who (I hope) learned from his/her experience with us, and yes, I spent a good part of my evening in Deadmines and didn't down Van Cleef, but I still had a good time (and learned a few things, too).
In the end I think this sums up PUGs. Some of them are great, some end in disaster, and some are just business as usual; successful, but not memorable. Sure, the arse hats are memorable and make you fear the PUG, but they're also few & far between, and if you let them keep you from PUGing Instances you're really only hurting yourself. After all, it's your $15. Why let someone else control your game?
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
What Blizzard did wrong
Hunters. Poor bloody Hunters.
Look at Warlocks. SOBs get their Pet as early as level 2 or 3 (depending on how keen you are and if you start as the Forsaken) so they learn how to play their Pet class, properly, almost right from the start.
Hunters. Poor bastiches start with Raptor Strike. A freaking MELEE special! Hunters! A ranged class, start the game with a freaking Melee-enhancing attack. Nice one, Blizzard. And when do they get their Pet? Not until level 10! What's one of the first Specials Hunters can train? Aspect of the Monkey, trainable at level 4! Aspect of the freaking Monkey! A buff that helps them Dodge! So they start with a Melee-enhancing special attack and get a Dodge Buff at Level 4, but don't get the quest to obtain their Pet until level 10! Their other Level 4 special is Serpent Sting, a DOT. So they have a DOT, a Dodge-enhancing Buff, and a Melee-enhancing Special. What does that imply about their combat style? Apply your DOT at Range, get off an Autoshot or two, then finish off the Mob in Melee.
Hunters can't even keep shooting when in Melee range. But why not? Why...the fuck...not?! Warlocks can cast Shadow Bolt even with a Mob smacking them in the face. Mages can get off their Frost Bolt, Druids can still cast Wrath, Priests can still cast Smite. Why can't Hunters Autoshot a Mob that's all up in their face? No reason, other than Blizzard hate the Hunter class.
So Hunters, right from the first level, are practically pigeon-holed into fighting Melee. And we wonder why Huntards have the reputation they do. Wonder no longer, dear readers, the truth is right in front of you. It's Blizzard's fault! Nice one, Blizzard. You bloody idiots!
See this? This is what a Hunter is supposed to do.
My Gun Skill is maxed out for my level (20@4) while my Axe & Unarmed Skills (at 1/20) suck. Why? Because I haven't engaged a single Mob in Melee! My Defense skill would have been 1 as well, except I got hit in Melee ONCE as I delivered the fatal shot. That's it. I've been Strafe-kiting Mobs as I shoot them to death AT RANGED because that's what a Hunter does. I haven't used Raptor Strike at all because I haven't needed to. I didn't bother learning Aspect of the Monkey because I'm not going to need it because I'm a Ranged DPS Class. The only time I plan to get hit is when I do my Tame Beast Quest, and later when I tame my Pet, and even then Monkey won't help me because you can't Dodge while channeling Tame Beast.
Blizzard, you fucked Hunters over, just as you're planning to fuck over all of your loyal customers when you force everyone to switch to BNet later this year if they want to keep playing WoW, and as you'll do next year if they want to multiplay SC2 (No LAN for you!), and with D3 as well. Whoops. You haven't announced that yet, have you? Sorry to pre-empt you there, and Lord, I hope I'm wrong. I really hope I'm wrong. Because if Blizzard release D3 without LAN support they can put me down for two lost sales, and make one of those a Collector's Edition. I know, I know, I'm just a drop in the bucket. But I bet I won't be the only drop. In fact I bet there will be a lot of drops, many who will wait to see if the crackers can come through, like they did with Spore's DRM, and release LAN-enabled copies of SC2.
But even if cracked copies of SC2 and D3 are released, and prove hugely popular, Blizzard still won't listen. They want their legitimate players on BNet and they'll go that route, even if it turns some of their customers away, because just as many of us will refuse to buy a BNet-only copy of SC2 or D3, there will be a lot of sheep who'll flock to the stores on opening days to secure their copy. That's fine, that's their choice. Blizzard's game, Blizzard's rules. Pity their rules only apply if I choose to play.
Rant over.
Look at Warlocks. SOBs get their Pet as early as level 2 or 3 (depending on how keen you are and if you start as the Forsaken) so they learn how to play their Pet class, properly, almost right from the start.
Hunters. Poor bastiches start with Raptor Strike. A freaking MELEE special! Hunters! A ranged class, start the game with a freaking Melee-enhancing attack. Nice one, Blizzard. And when do they get their Pet? Not until level 10! What's one of the first Specials Hunters can train? Aspect of the Monkey, trainable at level 4! Aspect of the freaking Monkey! A buff that helps them Dodge! So they start with a Melee-enhancing special attack and get a Dodge Buff at Level 4, but don't get the quest to obtain their Pet until level 10! Their other Level 4 special is Serpent Sting, a DOT. So they have a DOT, a Dodge-enhancing Buff, and a Melee-enhancing Special. What does that imply about their combat style? Apply your DOT at Range, get off an Autoshot or two, then finish off the Mob in Melee.
Hunters can't even keep shooting when in Melee range. But why not? Why...the fuck...not?! Warlocks can cast Shadow Bolt even with a Mob smacking them in the face. Mages can get off their Frost Bolt, Druids can still cast Wrath, Priests can still cast Smite. Why can't Hunters Autoshot a Mob that's all up in their face? No reason, other than Blizzard hate the Hunter class.
So Hunters, right from the first level, are practically pigeon-holed into fighting Melee. And we wonder why Huntards have the reputation they do. Wonder no longer, dear readers, the truth is right in front of you. It's Blizzard's fault! Nice one, Blizzard. You bloody idiots!
See this? This is what a Hunter is supposed to do.
My Gun Skill is maxed out for my level (20@4) while my Axe & Unarmed Skills (at 1/20) suck. Why? Because I haven't engaged a single Mob in Melee! My Defense skill would have been 1 as well, except I got hit in Melee ONCE as I delivered the fatal shot. That's it. I've been Strafe-kiting Mobs as I shoot them to death AT RANGED because that's what a Hunter does. I haven't used Raptor Strike at all because I haven't needed to. I didn't bother learning Aspect of the Monkey because I'm not going to need it because I'm a Ranged DPS Class. The only time I plan to get hit is when I do my Tame Beast Quest, and later when I tame my Pet, and even then Monkey won't help me because you can't Dodge while channeling Tame Beast.Blizzard, you fucked Hunters over, just as you're planning to fuck over all of your loyal customers when you force everyone to switch to BNet later this year if they want to keep playing WoW, and as you'll do next year if they want to multiplay SC2 (No LAN for you!), and with D3 as well. Whoops. You haven't announced that yet, have you? Sorry to pre-empt you there, and Lord, I hope I'm wrong. I really hope I'm wrong. Because if Blizzard release D3 without LAN support they can put me down for two lost sales, and make one of those a Collector's Edition. I know, I know, I'm just a drop in the bucket. But I bet I won't be the only drop. In fact I bet there will be a lot of drops, many who will wait to see if the crackers can come through, like they did with Spore's DRM, and release LAN-enabled copies of SC2.
But even if cracked copies of SC2 and D3 are released, and prove hugely popular, Blizzard still won't listen. They want their legitimate players on BNet and they'll go that route, even if it turns some of their customers away, because just as many of us will refuse to buy a BNet-only copy of SC2 or D3, there will be a lot of sheep who'll flock to the stores on opening days to secure their copy. That's fine, that's their choice. Blizzard's game, Blizzard's rules. Pity their rules only apply if I choose to play.
Rant over.
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
Following on...
comes the news that as of November 12th, 2009, WoW subscribers will need to merge their account with a Battlenet account if they want to keep playing. Users who fail to merge their account by that date will be unable to access (& play) WoW until they do.
Currently registration and use of BNet is free, but when one looks at BNet it invokes images of Sony's Station and Microsoft's XBox Live (I think that's it), neither of which are free.
Coming next year, some time, (when they're done, says Blizzard, so maybe 2011), are Starcraft 2 and Diablo 3.
Maybe I'm being a paranoid fatalist, but I'm thinking that following on the heels of this forced WoW/BNet merge will be a switch to a paid service, that is, BNet will no longer be free like it is today.
All those people still using it to multiplay Diablo 2, Warcraft 3, and Starcraf can still use it, they'll just need to fork over $15/month. But the good news is Blizzard will throw in a subscription to Vanilla WoW for free...as long as you pay the $15/month BNet fee :P
When Blizzard release Diablo 3 and/or Starcraft 2 I would not be surprised to see them introduce tiered pricing for BNet, i.e., $15 lets you play WoW over BNet, $25 lets you add D3 to the mix, while $32 (maybe $30, if you're lucky) gets you SC2 on top of that.
Don't want to pay for a BNet account? Dare I say it, would Blizzard be complete bastards, but would they not include any form of multiplayer support for D3 and SC2 other than over BNet? Currently you can multiplay D2 and Starcraft over a LAN or via a Direct2IP connection. Will this feature still be in D3 and SC2?
So Diablo 3 comes out and I drop $100 on two copies so my son and I can play together...but then I need to shell out another $30/month so we can actually play together over BNet because D3 won't multiplay over a LAN. That would suck more than Meter Maid switching from suck to blow (which blows more than it sucks, but that's getting away from the point) so I really hope I'm just being my typical paranoid, pessimistic self here. Of course an upside to making BNet a P2Play service (with a built-in subscription to WoW) is Blizzard would be able to report back to their shareholders that subscriptions to WoW are at an all-time high. Well, that's an upside for Blizzard, or it that just more pessism? :)
Currently registration and use of BNet is free, but when one looks at BNet it invokes images of Sony's Station and Microsoft's XBox Live (I think that's it), neither of which are free.
Coming next year, some time, (when they're done, says Blizzard, so maybe 2011), are Starcraft 2 and Diablo 3.
Maybe I'm being a paranoid fatalist, but I'm thinking that following on the heels of this forced WoW/BNet merge will be a switch to a paid service, that is, BNet will no longer be free like it is today.
All those people still using it to multiplay Diablo 2, Warcraft 3, and Starcraf can still use it, they'll just need to fork over $15/month. But the good news is Blizzard will throw in a subscription to Vanilla WoW for free...as long as you pay the $15/month BNet fee :P
When Blizzard release Diablo 3 and/or Starcraft 2 I would not be surprised to see them introduce tiered pricing for BNet, i.e., $15 lets you play WoW over BNet, $25 lets you add D3 to the mix, while $32 (maybe $30, if you're lucky) gets you SC2 on top of that.
Don't want to pay for a BNet account? Dare I say it, would Blizzard be complete bastards, but would they not include any form of multiplayer support for D3 and SC2 other than over BNet? Currently you can multiplay D2 and Starcraft over a LAN or via a Direct2IP connection. Will this feature still be in D3 and SC2?
So Diablo 3 comes out and I drop $100 on two copies so my son and I can play together...but then I need to shell out another $30/month so we can actually play together over BNet because D3 won't multiplay over a LAN. That would suck more than Meter Maid switching from suck to blow (which blows more than it sucks, but that's getting away from the point) so I really hope I'm just being my typical paranoid, pessimistic self here. Of course an upside to making BNet a P2Play service (with a built-in subscription to WoW) is Blizzard would be able to report back to their shareholders that subscriptions to WoW are at an all-time high. Well, that's an upside for Blizzard, or it that just more pessism? :)
Sunday, September 13, 2009
When courtesy causes accidents
Drive long enough and you'll run into them, hopefully not literally.
They're the drivers who are so over-cautious in trying to avoid accidents that they drive 10mph below the speed limit (or even slower) and piss off everyone else on the road who wants to drive at (or above) the legal limit.
They're the drivers who pull up to 4-Way Stop Signs or Roundabouts and refuse to take their turn. Instead they wave everyone else through the intersection ahead of them until not a single other car is waiting...except of course for the furious drivers behind them.
Today I came across a car waiting to pull out of the Gas Station, which is not an unusual sight. In this situation someone will inevitably leave a spot for the driver to pull out, usually when the light turns red, and that's what happened in this case when an Overly Cautious Driver left a space for Gas Station Man. But just as GSM was about to pull out a pedestrian walked up so, with GSM's car blocking the sidewalk, he considerately backed his car up and allowed the pedestrian to pass in front of him. Now that is an unusual sight. Most drivers aren't that respectful of pedestrians.
The light ahead of us went green and the first couple of cars drove through but not OCD (that's how I know he was an OCD and not just a Good Samaritan); OCD had offered to let GSM out ahead of him and Green Light and Pedestrian be damned! OCD was staying put until GSM pulled out so he could receive his karmic brownie points.
The pedestrian finally crossed in front of the car and I could see OCD still waving to GSM. "Come on! I'm letting you out! Come on!"
GSM & OCD maintained eye contact and exchanged Thank You! waves and You're welcome! waves and because GSM was doing this and looking at OCD instead of being cognizant of his surroundings...he completely failed to see the two kids riding their bikes on the sidewalk.
The front kid began to ride in front of GSM's car, just as the pedestrian had done just seconds before, except GSM was no longer looking out for peds and he gunned his engine and his car leaped forward. The kid was quick and he jerked his front wheel to the right but GSM was halfway into the road before he realized he had a new hood ornament. Luckily the kid managed to keep his bike upright and stay on it or he would have gone underneath GSM's car.
Once again GSM reversed his car back into the gas station while the kid wheeled his bike around and rejoined his friend on the sidewalk where they began exchanging angry words with GSM.
Seeing GSM was going to be occupied for a while OCD finally gave up on letting GSM out in front of him and, in the way of OCDs the world over who help to cause accidents but are never actually involved in them, finally drove through the intersection like he should have done in the first place.
They're the drivers who are so over-cautious in trying to avoid accidents that they drive 10mph below the speed limit (or even slower) and piss off everyone else on the road who wants to drive at (or above) the legal limit.
They're the drivers who pull up to 4-Way Stop Signs or Roundabouts and refuse to take their turn. Instead they wave everyone else through the intersection ahead of them until not a single other car is waiting...except of course for the furious drivers behind them.
Today I came across a car waiting to pull out of the Gas Station, which is not an unusual sight. In this situation someone will inevitably leave a spot for the driver to pull out, usually when the light turns red, and that's what happened in this case when an Overly Cautious Driver left a space for Gas Station Man. But just as GSM was about to pull out a pedestrian walked up so, with GSM's car blocking the sidewalk, he considerately backed his car up and allowed the pedestrian to pass in front of him. Now that is an unusual sight. Most drivers aren't that respectful of pedestrians.
The light ahead of us went green and the first couple of cars drove through but not OCD (that's how I know he was an OCD and not just a Good Samaritan); OCD had offered to let GSM out ahead of him and Green Light and Pedestrian be damned! OCD was staying put until GSM pulled out so he could receive his karmic brownie points.
The pedestrian finally crossed in front of the car and I could see OCD still waving to GSM. "Come on! I'm letting you out! Come on!"
GSM & OCD maintained eye contact and exchanged Thank You! waves and You're welcome! waves and because GSM was doing this and looking at OCD instead of being cognizant of his surroundings...he completely failed to see the two kids riding their bikes on the sidewalk.
The front kid began to ride in front of GSM's car, just as the pedestrian had done just seconds before, except GSM was no longer looking out for peds and he gunned his engine and his car leaped forward. The kid was quick and he jerked his front wheel to the right but GSM was halfway into the road before he realized he had a new hood ornament. Luckily the kid managed to keep his bike upright and stay on it or he would have gone underneath GSM's car.
Once again GSM reversed his car back into the gas station while the kid wheeled his bike around and rejoined his friend on the sidewalk where they began exchanging angry words with GSM.
Seeing GSM was going to be occupied for a while OCD finally gave up on letting GSM out in front of him and, in the way of OCDs the world over who help to cause accidents but are never actually involved in them, finally drove through the intersection like he should have done in the first place.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Ahh, sweet Irony.
During a recent job action I signed up to receive informational emails to keep me abreast of what was going on. As is the way of these things a double-agent got hold of the list with the result that both parties were sending propaganda back & forth. Some folks got rather vocal, belligerent even, and the emails went from informative to vindictive...and everyone always hit Reply All.
After this morning's latest round of arguments and name calling I'd finally had enough. I sent out an email of my own saying I didn't think name calling was helping either side, and that as professionals we needed to follow email etiquette, think about what we were sending, and whether it was really necessary to Reply All.
Then I requested I be taken off the list. Yes, via Reply All, as there was no other way to ubsubscribe.
Shortly afterwards I got a reply, as did everyone else on the List, because true to form my respondent felt compelled to hit Reply All when she wrote: "There's always the Delete button and the Spam filter!"
Good advice, I thought, as I deleted her from my address book and marked her email as "Spam" :P
After this morning's latest round of arguments and name calling I'd finally had enough. I sent out an email of my own saying I didn't think name calling was helping either side, and that as professionals we needed to follow email etiquette, think about what we were sending, and whether it was really necessary to Reply All.
Then I requested I be taken off the list. Yes, via Reply All, as there was no other way to ubsubscribe.
Shortly afterwards I got a reply, as did everyone else on the List, because true to form my respondent felt compelled to hit Reply All when she wrote: "There's always the Delete button and the Spam filter!"
Good advice, I thought, as I deleted her from my address book and marked her email as "Spam" :P
Thursday, June 04, 2009
Update on the War on Starbucks
It's (almost) a month down the road and I've heard nothing back from Starbucks. Zip. Nada. Absolute Zero (which is technically less than nothing).
I had a couple of $2 gift cards for Subway I got in the mail (as a result of a Class Action Lawsuit) so I thought I'd eat there today. I couldn't pass up a (as it turned out) $1.46 Footlong Sub. It was funny walking over there because they're right next to the Starbucks...which I almost walked into. By sheer force of habit I started to walk into the Starbucks store and had to stop myself and continue on into the Subway.
Where I ran into one of the Starbucks' girls getting her lunch.
I told her I hadn't heard anything back from Starbucks and she said, "You won't, they don't care" and she's probably right.
At the very least I expected something along the lines of:
"We're sorry you feel this way, but this is a long standing policy of Starbucks. Please note that we only request our staff cover any tattoos, we do not discriminate against our customers."
I've been steadfast in my resolve, and while I've only been to Coffee Bean a couple of times during the last month, I've also not given in and gone to the much closer Starbucks.
The natural result of this is I've also greatly cut down on my coffee consumption, both at work and at home, with the result that when we went out for breakfast last weekend and I drank my typical 4 (or 5) cups of coffee I could feel it kicking in. It wasn't pleasant, and actually left me feeling nauseous, or maybe it was just that breakfast was at IHOP :P So now I have one or two cups of coffee from our machine here in the office, and a couple of cups during the weekend, and that's it.
To Anon (who disagreed with me in the comments of the last post, but was so polite about it) - I really hope you weren't serious and you didn't ramp up your coffee purchase (& consumption) on my behalf. While that was a noble gesture, it would seem Starbucks don't care about me not going there any more, and they probably don't care that you're going more often, either. We're just a drop in the ocean to them.
That said, I'm going to send them one last letter, explaining what I've done so far, and how I'm disappointed that I haven't received any response from them at all, so clearly they don't care about losing me as a customer. I don't really expect to receive a reply to that second letter, and yet I've done things like this before with different companies and have received responses, so if other giant corporations can take the time to respond to concerned customers, why can't Starbucks? Perhaps they've been losing so much money that they've laid off their Customer Service staff...
I had a couple of $2 gift cards for Subway I got in the mail (as a result of a Class Action Lawsuit) so I thought I'd eat there today. I couldn't pass up a (as it turned out) $1.46 Footlong Sub. It was funny walking over there because they're right next to the Starbucks...which I almost walked into. By sheer force of habit I started to walk into the Starbucks store and had to stop myself and continue on into the Subway.
Where I ran into one of the Starbucks' girls getting her lunch.
I told her I hadn't heard anything back from Starbucks and she said, "You won't, they don't care" and she's probably right.
At the very least I expected something along the lines of:
"We're sorry you feel this way, but this is a long standing policy of Starbucks. Please note that we only request our staff cover any tattoos, we do not discriminate against our customers."
I've been steadfast in my resolve, and while I've only been to Coffee Bean a couple of times during the last month, I've also not given in and gone to the much closer Starbucks.
The natural result of this is I've also greatly cut down on my coffee consumption, both at work and at home, with the result that when we went out for breakfast last weekend and I drank my typical 4 (or 5) cups of coffee I could feel it kicking in. It wasn't pleasant, and actually left me feeling nauseous, or maybe it was just that breakfast was at IHOP :P So now I have one or two cups of coffee from our machine here in the office, and a couple of cups during the weekend, and that's it.
To Anon (who disagreed with me in the comments of the last post, but was so polite about it) - I really hope you weren't serious and you didn't ramp up your coffee purchase (& consumption) on my behalf. While that was a noble gesture, it would seem Starbucks don't care about me not going there any more, and they probably don't care that you're going more often, either. We're just a drop in the ocean to them.
That said, I'm going to send them one last letter, explaining what I've done so far, and how I'm disappointed that I haven't received any response from them at all, so clearly they don't care about losing me as a customer. I don't really expect to receive a reply to that second letter, and yet I've done things like this before with different companies and have received responses, so if other giant corporations can take the time to respond to concerned customers, why can't Starbucks? Perhaps they've been losing so much money that they've laid off their Customer Service staff...
Friday, May 08, 2009
The Cap'n goes to war
Not literally. I'm not being shipped off to Iraq, or Afghanistan, or anywhere like that.
Can I eradicate World Hunger? Cure Cancer? Solve the Global Warming problem? No, I can't (although I can do my small part). What I can do is pick my battles, which is why I've declared war on Starbucks. Now in case you were not aware of it Starbucks has a policy which discriminates against a select group of their employees, and by having this policy they inadvertently discriminate against me. Maybe I'll make a difference, maybe not, but if nobody ever tried nothing would ever get done around here, so the Cap'n is declaring war on Starbucks.
Because Starbucks forces their employees to cover up their tattoos with clothing, bandages, or even stickers, I feel it would be hypocritical of me to continue giving them my business. So today, instead of going to the Starbucks across the road from my office, I walked a couple of blocks to the closest Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf. Then back at my office I stapled the Coffee Bean receipt to my protest letter (for extra weight), and with Coffee Bean drink in hand I delivered my letter to the Starbucks across the road. I apologized to the girls there, told them they were fantastic, that I even said so in the letter, and explained that I was doing this for them as much as for myself.
Starbucks bends over backwards to cater to the individual, and the staff there will make your drink exactly how you like it, regardless of how you like it. But for a company which respects the individuality of the customer, they do not respect the individuality of their employees.
Can I eradicate World Hunger? Cure Cancer? Solve the Global Warming problem? No, I can't (although I can do my small part). What I can do is pick my battles, which is why I've declared war on Starbucks. Now in case you were not aware of it Starbucks has a policy which discriminates against a select group of their employees, and by having this policy they inadvertently discriminate against me. Maybe I'll make a difference, maybe not, but if nobody ever tried nothing would ever get done around here, so the Cap'n is declaring war on Starbucks.
Because Starbucks forces their employees to cover up their tattoos with clothing, bandages, or even stickers, I feel it would be hypocritical of me to continue giving them my business. So today, instead of going to the Starbucks across the road from my office, I walked a couple of blocks to the closest Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf. Then back at my office I stapled the Coffee Bean receipt to my protest letter (for extra weight), and with Coffee Bean drink in hand I delivered my letter to the Starbucks across the road. I apologized to the girls there, told them they were fantastic, that I even said so in the letter, and explained that I was doing this for them as much as for myself.
Starbucks bends over backwards to cater to the individual, and the staff there will make your drink exactly how you like it, regardless of how you like it. But for a company which respects the individuality of the customer, they do not respect the individuality of their employees.
Monday, December 15, 2008
Fable II
Does Microsoft really need to sell their X-Box so badly that they'll force gamers to buy it just to play Fable II?
Considering you can't play Halo on the PC (or we'd spank those console players arses, and they know it), it really shouldn't be a surprise, but it's still fucking annoying. And no, I'm not going to buy an X-Box just to play Fable II...I already have an X-Box, it's called a PC, and it kicks the X-Box's arse.
Fucking Microsoft.
/rant off
Considering you can't play Halo on the PC (or we'd spank those console players arses, and they know it), it really shouldn't be a surprise, but it's still fucking annoying. And no, I'm not going to buy an X-Box just to play Fable II...I already have an X-Box, it's called a PC, and it kicks the X-Box's arse.
Fucking Microsoft.
/rant off
Monday, October 27, 2008
The lesser of two evils?
It doesn't have to be this way, so don't be a sheep and don't allow the media to brainwash you. A vote for someone other than one of the two evils is not a wasted vote.
When it's not compulsory to vote you should be free to vote for the candidate of your choice, in fact you should be commended for taking an interest in the running of your country, not made to feel guilty for doing so.
The truth is if everyone who could legally vote did so, and if everyone voted for the candidate of their choice, not just for one of the two evils, then both evils would probably be more than a little shocked at the result.
Although I am the famous Wizard 101 Blogger, I don't claim to have a huge readership, but perhaps the following will inspire others to get the message out and together we can educate the masses.
You have a choice, and it's your own choice to make. Don't make a choice out of fear, don't feel you have to vote for one of the two evils. Vote for the candidate you think actually has the knowledge and experience to run the country.
Because they already get enough air time I'm not going to name either of the two evils here (or even link to their pages), instead, here are the people the two evils would probably much rather you didn't know about.
The Libertarian Party candidate, Congressman Bob Barr.
The Constitution Party candidate, Pastor Chuck Baldwin.
The Green Party candidate, former Congresswoman Cynthia McKinney.
Independent candidate Ralph Nader.
Of particular note is that Cynthia McKinney is not just a woman, but an African-American woman! Now why the hell isn't she getting more press time?
Because the media want you to vote for one of the two evils, so they promote them and forsake everyone else.
Don't let the wolf lead you astray, or the shepherd pull the wool over your eyes.
Vote (or don't vote) for the candidate of your choice. Now if your choice is one of the two evils, good for you, but be true to yourself, make sure it's your choice, not that of the media.
When it's not compulsory to vote you should be free to vote for the candidate of your choice, in fact you should be commended for taking an interest in the running of your country, not made to feel guilty for doing so.
The truth is if everyone who could legally vote did so, and if everyone voted for the candidate of their choice, not just for one of the two evils, then both evils would probably be more than a little shocked at the result.
Although I am the famous Wizard 101 Blogger, I don't claim to have a huge readership, but perhaps the following will inspire others to get the message out and together we can educate the masses.
You have a choice, and it's your own choice to make. Don't make a choice out of fear, don't feel you have to vote for one of the two evils. Vote for the candidate you think actually has the knowledge and experience to run the country.
Because they already get enough air time I'm not going to name either of the two evils here (or even link to their pages), instead, here are the people the two evils would probably much rather you didn't know about.
The Libertarian Party candidate, Congressman Bob Barr.
The Constitution Party candidate, Pastor Chuck Baldwin.
The Green Party candidate, former Congresswoman Cynthia McKinney.
Independent candidate Ralph Nader.
Of particular note is that Cynthia McKinney is not just a woman, but an African-American woman! Now why the hell isn't she getting more press time?
Because the media want you to vote for one of the two evils, so they promote them and forsake everyone else.
Don't let the wolf lead you astray, or the shepherd pull the wool over your eyes.
Vote (or don't vote) for the candidate of your choice. Now if your choice is one of the two evils, good for you, but be true to yourself, make sure it's your choice, not that of the media.
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