Friday, December 29, 2006

How to watch American Gothic

Liz got me the boxed set of American Gothic for Christmas. I watched this years ago in mid to late 90s in Australia, and it wasn't until recently that I found out why the series seemed so disjointed when I watched it.

Both CBS here in the U.S. and whichever station aired it in Australia showed the episodes out of order. When Universal released the boxed set they arranged the episodes on the discs according to CBS's airing date, so if you watch the discs from 1 thru 6 you're doing yourself a disservice, because Disc 6 (or Disc 3) contains unaired episodes which need to be seen partway through the series at certain points, and in one episode one of the major characters leaves the series (for good) but returns in the very next episode, at least he did if you watched the original series or will if you watch the discs from start to finish.

Here's how to watch American Gothic. Note that it involves a lot of disc changing and flipping.

1 - "Pilot" Disc 1, Side A:Episode 1
2 - "A tree grows in Trinity" 1A:2
3 - "Eye of the Beholder" 1A:3 (so far, so good, right? Now flip Disc 1 to side B to watch...)

4 - "Damned if you don't" 1B:1 (now change to Disc 3, side A to watch...)

5 - "Potato Boy" 3A:4 (missing episode, never aired. Now, back to Disc 1, Side B for...)

6 - "Dead to the World" 1B:2
7 - "Meet the Beetles" 1B:3
8 - "Strong Arm of the Law" 1B:4

9 - "To Hell and back" 2B:3 (Yes, Disc 2, Side B:Episode 3)
10 - "The Beast Within" 2B:2 (Yes, Episode 2, the one before the one you just watched. Now flip Disc 2 to Side A.)

11 - "Rebirth" 2A:1 (then change to Disc 3, Side B)

12 - "Ring of Fire" 3B:1 (another mid-season episode that was never aired. Now back to Disc 2, Side A.)

13 - "Resurrector" 2A:2
14 - "Inhumanitas" 2A:3
15 - "The Plague Sower" 2A:4

16 - "Doctor Death takes a holiday" 2B:1
17 - "Learning to crawl" 2B:4

18 - "Echo of your last goodbye" 3B:2 (never aired)
19 - "Strangler" 3B:3 (that's two episodes in a row that were never aired)

20 - "Triangle" 3A:1
21 - "The Buck stops here" 3A:2
22 - "Requiem" 3A:2

So you had 6 discs (or three double-sided discs), but you needed to change/flip them 10 times to watch the series in the correct chronological order. I'm still going to do that when I watch them, because even now, almost a decade later, I can remember things didn't quite make sense when I originally watched American Gothic.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Dinner at Todai

Liz and I had dinner at Todai, a Japanese Noodle House & Sushi Bar. I think this was the second time I've been to Todai. The first time I was not overly impressed. We paid around $20 or so for our meal and I ate hardly anything. This is because at the time I was not overly keen on sushi. I think I ate some Chicken Teriyaki and that was about it.

Liz said me not eating sushi would have been grounds for divorce (irreconcilable differences?) so it's a good thing I eat it now ;)

She said this time when I returned to the table with a plate full of raw fish the people at a nearby table were apparently going nuts that a Kwai Lo (Gaijin) was voluntarily eating sushi.

Midway through our meal a young Chinese man and his female friend (also a Kwai Lo) were shown to the table next to us and they promkptly hit the buffet. When the young lady returned with a plate full of glass noodles and some teriyaki (as opposed to sushi) her male companion seemed flabbergasted that she would come to Todai and not dine on raw fish. When the young man returned to the sushi bar for his second plate the young lady also stood, leaving almost her entire plate of noodles untouched. Seeing someone who needed rescuing (sort of) when she promptly came back to pick up her purse I told her that at the very end of the buffet she'd find the fruit, desserts, and a chef making crepes to order.

The young lady was gone for a long time.

Liz and I were wondering if she'd left (stood up) her "friend", and judging by the concerned way he was looking around I think he was having the same thought. Liz thought it was hilarious and said she'd blog about if she'd left. I said it wasn't funny (not really ;) but sad if she had. But then Liz saw the young lady all the way down at the end of the buffet, where the crepes were being made; the young lady's friend had his view blocked by a pillar and endured several more minutes wondering where his dinner companion was.

Finally she returned with a crepe and plate full of fruit, and once more the young man's eyes bugged out his head. Fruit! Not raw fish! You could see him wondering just why they'd come to Todai if she wasn't going to eat sushi.

As we left and walked past their table the young lady made eye contact with me and I saw her silently mouth Thank You. I smiled at her and nodded my head, You're Welcome.

When my mum and her friend were here a couple of months back they also tried sushi. We gave them the easy stuff though. California Rolls & Philadelphia Rolls. They tried it but weren't too keen on it. Sushi is definitely an acquired taste, and if you don't like it then Todai is not the place for you.

Sunday, December 24, 2006

Ironic?

I just closed Firefox, but as I clicked the X to close the last window Firefox decided to crash and shut down, which prompted the QC Prog to boot up, and I just had to send Mozilla the Error Report. I couldn't resist. Because one of the questions the QC Prog asks you is "What were you doing when Firefox stopped working?" Well, I was closing Firefox...so...if Firefox feels the urge to shut down when I tell it to shut down, is that really a problem?

Friday, December 22, 2006

I knew it!

I should have slept in and come in late today. The Boss just came around and said we all can leave at 2:30 today. Which just happens to be the time I am scheduled to leave on Fridays. Typical. At least I'm off next Friday, Dec. 29th when they'd pull the same stunt...and Monday is the New Year's Day Holiday. A 3-day weekend about to begin, a 3-day work week coming up and a 4-day weekend just around the corner. Life is good.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Vegas revisited

Now it wasn't all doom & gloom in Vegas.

Liz got a lot of shopping done at an outlet mall near some place called Whisky Pete's. We actually dropped her there then drove on into Vegas and checked into Circus Circus. Later Liz caught a coach into Vegas and met us at the Bellagio for the buffet dinner. Then we walked The Strip and ended up riding the Monorail north to the end of the line where we turned around and rode it all the way back south. It was pretty late but we got to see all of the lights of the city from the Monorail, so that was cool. We also watched the Bellagio's water & lights show in the artificial lake which fronts their hotel.

Saturday we rode the bus down The Strip for $5 each for a 24 hour pass. JE was free so that was a bonus. We stopped at some mall near Treasure Island, then jumped back on board the bus and rode it down to Mandalay Bay where we toured the Shark Reef. They have handheld units not unlike chunky old cell phones that you can listen to as you walk around the aquarium. The sad thing was the almost constant reminder to turn in your "wand" as Mandalay Bay called them. It would seem as though Vegas is not Sin City but Souvenir City. The wake up call was when we got up Saturday morning and the Do Not Disturb sign was missing from our hotel door. Actually prior to that was the conspicuously absent TV Remote Control. Then again, a previous occupant of the hotel we stayed at in San Diego had stolen the batteries from the TV Remote Control...but at least they left us the remote.

Saturday afternoon we wound up in a mall near Aladdin. It was an amazing mall. The ceiling was painted to resemble the sky, with fluffy white clouds, and as you walked along looking at the stores your eyes tried to tell you that the clouds themselves were moving. It was very realistic. One part of that mall was made out to look like an Italian village complete with a fountain, and every half-hour on Friday, Saturday & Sunday there is a rainstorm in that section of the mall complete with thunder and flashes of light(ning). For the next five minutes the "rain" pours from sprinklers in the ceiling into the fountain accompanied by real rain sounds. Very cool.

Afterwards we rode the bus back up to our hotel where we caught the 9pm Circus performance. I was a bit disappointed that it was nothing more than a 5-min solo trapeze artist/aerial dance act. I would have thought there would be more of a show, at least something for 15 minutes or so. We grabbed a late dinner from the McDonalds located inside the Hotel and took it back to our room where we watched a movie then fell asleep.

Sunday was a lazy buffet breakfast, then a mad dash to get the hell out of Vegas before the traffic. Well you can't beat the traffic (unless you leave the day before) because a lot of people have the same idea and leave early on Sunday, but obviously the later you leave the longer it will take you to get back home. We made it back to L.A. in around 3 hours or so. A respectable time.

We'll go back one day, when the kids are older...maybe when they're old enough to look after themselves for a day or two ;)

People unclear on the concept

My Union somehow created an email list of work email addys and has been sending out propaganda about upcoming activities, slow-downs, stoppages and strike actions. Today someone finally responded and asked to be removed from the "hate mail" list. I know they responded because they sent their request to every single person who'd received the email. That of course inspired several other people to ask to be removed as well, with a few Techies chiming in and telling people if they wanted to be removed to reply to the original sender, not to do a Reply All.

So far three IT people have requested people do a Reply to Sender, and eight TI people have sent a Reply All email. TI would be the Technologically Inept :P

*Update* Five more TIs just asked everyone to remove them from the mailing list, and two more IT just asked why are people continuing to do a Reply All. You have to be amused by TI people, otherwise you'd get arrested for choking the living shit out of them :D

Sunday, December 17, 2006

Vegas, and back

After more than eight years here in the U.S. I finally made it to Las Vegas. Liz and I had planned Vegas trips before in the past, but something always came up that required us to cancel. This time around we made it with JE tagging along; Amber stayed home with the grandparents. In retrospect, JE should have stayed behind too, as after eight years in the making this was just a ho-hum kind of trip, and JE added very little to the Wow! factor.

We'd booked into Circus Circus, which is sort of a good place for the kids, but this is Las Vegas, NV. Nowhere is really for the kids. JE wanted to play the games, and there's games everywhere, but 99% of the games require you to be 21 or older. There's also the smoking. We've been spoiled, living here in the people's republic of Kalifornia, and so people passing us in the hotel corridor with cigarettes in their hands or mouths doesn't make for a great vacation, but then is Vegas.

La Reve at the Wynn was also not playing this weekend, and that was The Show I wanted to see. The Pirate show at Treasure Island was also under going maintenance, resuming next weekend. Did I mention JE wanted to play games? That was also all he wanted to do. I know he's six, and every parent the world over has had to (or will have to) deal with a six year old on vacation, but man, this kid just wanted to whine about playing. Sure, we didn't spend money gambling so we spent $25 playing video games for two hours, and as soon as we left the arcade JE started complaining about wanting to go back to the Hotel to play more games.

The buffets I could take or leave. We had dinner the first night at the Bellagio. Now I love this double standard Vegas has. How old is your child? Six? I see. You can't enter the casinos, but to make it up to you we'll charge you the full price for the buffet. JE then proceeded to eat three croissants and several chocolate chip cookies, for which we paid almost $40, for him that is. It was close to $120 for dinner for the three of us. Lovely. At least Liz and I ate our fill.

Eight years in the making. Las Vegas. I could care less if I never go there again. Maybe for one night if just Liz and I go. We can enjoy a buffet without stressing over a $40 croissant, and we can enjoy a show without listening to whining kids wanting to play video games...at least they won't be our own. Speaking of which, it was amazing how many kids we passed sitting on the benches outside the casinos, obviously waiting for mum and/or dad who were inside gambling their money away.

Tuesday, December 12, 2006

Hooray!

My Kris Kringle/Secret Santa came through today. In fact I actually wound up with two gifts. I got a small potted plant and this 4.5" Globe by Replogle, which is actually kind of cool. You don't have a lot of desk space in a cubicle, so I appreciate it's smaller size :)

Survival Tip #1

Yeah, this is a sad story, but guess what? James Kim was obviously not prepared for the trip he and his family were taking. This was not just a simple road trip from LA to SF. This was a 600+ mile Road Trip. Yeah, capitalized, because this was a big trip. Maybe it's just me being a Boy Scout (and an Australian, and a Survivalist) but I have little sympathy for this guy because he absolutely 100% did the Wrong Thing.

Driving from Portland, OR to San Francisco, CA may look like a walk in the park at Google Maps, but that's a serious drive through serious wilderness, and the Kim family undertook that drive in inclement weather.

James and his family apparently survived for a week (on very limited supplies) before James made the fatal decision to go for help. His family were found within 24 hours of his leaving them. Now James had no way of knowing that rescue was literally hours away, so he's not at fault there. James is at fault for not staying put. He apparently went out into freezing conditions wearing the same clothes he'd wear for a trip to the corner store. Street clothes, he was described as wearing. He had F'ing tennis shoes on his feet. The man was wearing jeans, a light jacket, and tennis shoes, and he set out into blizzard conditions to go for help. Wrong thing to do, James.

WWJD? What would John do? If dressed like James was, John would stay with his family. No, I would not go for help. I would not leave my family behind. Even if I was dressed appropriately I still wouldn't go for help. Even if my family were dressed appropriately we still wouldn't go for help. Of course we also have blankets in our car, including reflective, thermal blankets. We have water, first aid kit, and on long trips I always carry our 2-way radios which have a 20-mile range (probably less in hilly conditions though).

The first rule when you are lost (in the Wilderness, that is) is stay where you are. Set up camp right where you are and DO NOT MOVE! People love you. People will miss you. If you've done the right thing you will have let people know where you're going and when you expect to get there...or get back. If your loved ones do not receive a phone call from you saying you got there (or back) they will alert the authorities, and a search will be conducted, and you will be found. If you're smart you'll be prepared. You'll have provisions in your car or your backpack. You'll have a tent or emergency clothing to keep you warm. Maybe even a sleeping bag. You'll have the ability to make fire. If you have fresh water and you can stay warm and dry, you can survive for at least 2 weeks. If people are missing you and looking for you, they will find you within a week or so. Believe it or not but there are people in this world who when they start looking for a lost person, they do not give up. They may not even know the person they're looking for, but they refuse to give up. If the search is called off it's this person who will find you, and they will find you, but if you wander off, if you move around, you're making their job a damn sight harder. The search will take longer, and you've just increased your chances of being found...dead, like James.

It's (morbidly) amusing how the media are trying to make out James was some sort of superman, that he walked 15 miles through the snow and cold...in a circle...to be found (dead) barely miles from his family car. What kind of effort would that take, people ask. A superhuman effort, is the typical response. No, this is just a guy who wandered off, unprepared and improperly clothed for the conditions, and whose mind probably shut down while his body kept on walking aimlessly. Yeah, he walked 15 miles in the freezing cold in jeans and a jacket, but he's still dead, and if he'd stayed with his family he'd be alive.

You NEVER leave your family. I read stories all the time of the father who leaves his family to go for help. He dies and the family gets rescued because the searchers are looking in the area where the family got lost. Not 10 miles way where the father now is.

If you only take one thing away from this, don't be like James. When you're lost stay where you are. Set up camp, dig in and prepare to be there for a while, and survive.

Saturday, December 09, 2006

A day at Sea World

Liz has come down with a cold and went to bed early last night, after telling me she wouldn't be coming to Sea World today. That meant I went with JE, his school-chum W, and W's mom C. C is a CBA, or a Chinese-born American, who speaks very little english, but her english is still better than my chinese.

When I got up this morning I was not feeling too good either, nose was running and I had a tickle in my throat. Maybe Trader Joe's Airborne came through because I'm feeling pretty good now. I decided the kids had been told they were going to Sea World, and so were looking forward to it, so I might as well tough it out and take them. I'd already popped an allergy tablet when I got up (& taken the Airborne) but before leaving I took a couple of Dayquil as well. That might not have been such a wise move because halfway to San Diego I noticed I was having trouble keeping my eyes open. When I found myself drifting towards the left of the lane, and realized I'd just had my eyes closed for a good couple of seconds, I decided it was time to pull over. We pulled into a gas station, had a bit of a stretch, and one Snickers bar & one Full Throttle later we were back on our way and I was feeling good!

The day was kind of interesting. C and I had a bit of chat, as much as the language barrier would let us. JE & W were like the proverbial Odd Couple. Best of friends one minute, trying to kill each other the next. It was a strange day. We went on the Wild Arctic ride, one of those gyroscope rides that tricks you into thinking you're doing something you're not. In Wild Arctic's case it makes you think you're on a helicopter flying over the Arctic, spying on animals, dodging falling rocks and avoiding a blizzard. JE is not too fond of roller coasters, but Wild Arctic is not a roller coaster and I knew he'd like it once it started. I explained to C what the deal was with Wild Arctic, or at least I think I did, so she had no problems going in. I forgot all about W and his mild case of motion sickness (sans the vomiting) on the way down watching JE play Gameboy & DS. As soon as the ride started up W leaned his head on C's shoulder and closed his eyes, opening them occasionally and almost immediately closing them again. But as we were exiting the ride once it was over W was the first to shout "That was cool!"

We saw pretty much everything there is to see at Sea World, that would be of interest to 6-year old boys. We didn't do the log plume ride, or any of the roller coasters (except for Wild Arctic, which isn't a roller coaster), but we saw all of the shows except for the Dolphin Show (which I figured was practically the same as Shamu, just with smaller mammals.) The Dolphin Show also started at about the same time as the Sea Lion & Otter show, so that was the one we saw instead. We also didn't watch R.L. Stine's "Haunted Lighthouse (in 3D)" because the boys vetoed that as soon as I asked if they wanted to see a scary movie. It's not that scary unless you're six years old ;)

The drive home was horrible. Traffic was bumper to bumper almost all 130 miles of the trip, and when we hit the rain in Los Angeles it only made it worse. I think it took us close to three hours to get home (maybe longer). Highlight of the return trip was JE asking W if he'd watched "Grandma got run over by a Reindeer", which was on the TV last night. W said he hadn't. JE said "I did, and guess what? The Grandma got run over by a Reindeer!"

Now I'm home, and I think it's time for coffee.

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Net down!

We had no internet last night so I watched the Backlash 2003 DVD from Netflix. There was an excellent match between Goldberg and The Rock. The Rock changed his persona for this match to a less than confident wrestler, and I didn't like it anywhere near as much as the cocksure, arrogant Rock of yesteryear, but it worked very well for the match. Goldberg was clearly the aggressor and the crowd favorite while The Rock's whimpy but still somewhat confident persona made him an excellent Heel.

The Rock spent most of the match trying to avoid Goldberg until he dodged a Spear and unable to check his momentum Goldberg flew through the ropes and into the corner post. Goldberg appeared to legitimately hurt his right arm & shoulder and blood was clearly visible on his right bicep. It was not running like the blood from a traditional wrestling head wound, so it was most likely a scrape, albeit a large one, but it was definitely a Hard Way injury. The Rock capitalized on this for a while (the injury was probably in the script, just not to that degree), and focused on Goldberg's right arm but despite this neither man was able to gain the upper hand. The match was in a similar vein to Wrestlemania VI's Main Event between The Ultimate Warrior and Hulk Hogan.

When the Rock set him up for a Rock Bottom, Goldberg countered with a Spear and went for the Pin, but The Rock kicked out at the 2-count. When the Rock later landed the Rock Bottom then hit Goldberg with the People's Elbow it was the big man's turn to kick out, and The Rock looked shaken and stirred. The Rock is one of wrestling's best mat actors. Shortly after that Goldberg took The Rock down with a Spear and then quickly ran to the opposite corner and assumed the position. No, not a mating position :P

With Goldberg poised in the far corner, The Rock slowly got to his feet and touched his arms and his legs as if to assure himself they were all there. With a pleasantly surprised look on his face that everything was intact and he was still alive, The Rock brushed himself off and turned around just in time to receive a third Spear! Goldberg then hoisted The Rock up onto his shoulder before driving him into the mat with his signature finishing move, the Jackhammer. 1-2-3 went the Ref and Goldberg was declared the winner.

With the wrestling over and nothing to watch on TV, I hopped on my computer and bemoaned the lack of the internet. I played some Single-Player Quake III Arena, I played a few levels of Neighbors from Hell, but shooting robots and playing practical jokes on a balding, perverted slob of a neighbor was just not that amusing. I couldn't even be bothered trying to string every joke together for the ultimate 100% Super Joke.

Finally I called it quits and went to bed early for a change. This morning I looked at the Cable Modem and sure enough, we had a solid internet connection. Typical.

Monday, December 04, 2006

Rate my Response

I got in to work this morning and found the following email from Boss#1

- - - - -
John, I can't seem to find our October 2006 report. Did we do one? Just a reminder we need the November as well. Thanks!
- - - - -

I was a little irked by this because I used to have a boss back in Australia who required us all to have Diaries, and at the end of the day, after we'd left work, he'd come around to our work stations and write us little notes telling us what he wanted us to do the next day, and he wasn't always polite about it. We had an altercation in writing where he accused me of screwing up and lying to cover my ass, but the computer inventory system (which he'd personally hired me to install) saved me that day and provided me with evidence to back me up. I left my old boss a note in my diary that the next time he wanted to call me a liar he do so to my face, and I never got any nasty notes after that. Ever since then I'm very edgy when I receive missives from supervisors.

So my reply was as follows, amended slightly to once again cover my ass.

- - - - -
Boss#1, exactly which report are you after?

I've attached the three reports I prepared for the month of October.

Report1 is located on the server in folder1
Report2 is also located on the server in folder2
& Report3 is located in folder3

November's Report1 was emailed to you & Boss#2 on November 30 with the subject line BigBossDoc. Because you'd requested we use the format provided by Big Boss I revised the document you sent me, hence the name BigBossDoc, but it's essentially November Report1 (which I've just now saved in folder1 under that name).

I'll be working on Report2 and Report3 this week and they will be ready for the Meeting next Tuesday, Dec. 12.

As far as I'm aware these are all of the monthly reports I'm responsible for preparing and we're completely up-to-date with them, or will be by the end of the week.

Thanks,
John.
- - - - -

As Boss#1 had cc'd Boss#2, I sent my reply to both Boss#1 & Boss#2

I think I contained myself fairly well, but that's my opinion. What does everyone else think? And how would you have handled this situation? Pertinent information is that work on Report2 and Report3 could not begin until this week, because we need month-end figures from November.

Tuesday, November 28, 2006

House is getting interesting again

It was getting boring.

Hmm, I wonder what disease she has? Oh my goodness, it's the Bubonic Plague! Why didn't we think of that sooner?

Hmm, I wonder what disease he has? Oh my goodness, it's the Ebola Gulf Virus! Why didn't we think of that sooner?

Now it's getting more interesting again.

House: I need my Vicodin!

House's buddies: We're not writing you a prescription, and you're not getting our prescription pads to forge yourself more, either.

House: I need my Vicodin!

Copper (up whose bum House apparently stuck a thermometer): Mwah hah ha! You goin' down, House!

Yep, House is getting very interesting, now that it's taken a detour from the same old cliche "What disease does he/she/it have this week?"

Monday, November 27, 2006

Shopping...over Thanksgiving

Saturday morning I was supposed to donate blood, platelets in particular. I had an 8:30 appointment with City of Hope and I was right on time, then I read the list of items that excludes you from donating blood: having a cold or the flu, recent piercings...tattoos. I had to tell the lady I got a tattoo in February so I'm not able to donate blood for another 5 months.

On the way home my cellphone buzzed to tell me I'd missed a call from the in-laws but they hadn't left a message. When I got home they'd left a message on our machine asking for Liz's help but she was still sleeping so JE and I played video games for a while.

The in-laws called again around 10am and Liz took the call; their TV had died and they wanted our help buying a new one. I had to violate a personal rule of mine not to set foot in a shopping center between Thanksgiving and New Years just to help the in-laws get a new TV. I did insist that I couldn't carry it (my left arm is still f'd up, torn muscles take a looooong time to heal) and that they'd have to get the TV delivered. I was angling for an online purchase but it wasn't going to happen; the in-laws wanted to visit a brick & stone store and they wanted me along for my "expert" advice, which consisted of me looking at TVs and picking out the cheapest one with the clearest picture. They got a 27" Sony Flatscreen (not Flat Panel, old style bulky CRT but in a Flat Screen) with an insanely sharp picture for just $300. Next to our old Toshiba (newer model of our old TV) it looked amazing. I'm jealous. Liz found a big screen TV online last night for cheap (for a big screen) but we resisted...I think...I wonder if she still went ahead and bought it. I did tell her to :D

The FIL asked how much for delivery and was told $50. That's too much for him and we have the SUV with us (why didn't we drive my Focus?!?!) so he says we'll take it. I repeat to Liz that there's no way I can carry the TV, or even help carry the TV, not into their house nor upstairs where they'll want it. My arm will heal on its own, slowly, but it will heal; if I attempt to pick up something as heavy as a TV I'm gonna need surgery to repair a badly torn muscle. Liz assures me it's ok and the in-laws say they'll take care of it, but I'm still skeptical.

At this point JE is begging to play some video games like we'd promised him, so I give my Credit Card to Liz and take him over to the video game section. Only a couple of systems are hooked up and of course they've all got people playing them or waiting for them, and none of the games are what JE would enjoy playing. We get to the big screen TV with the PS2 and Guitar Hero II (it's a guitar playing equivalent of Dance Dance Revolution) and there's two young boys, maybe 10 or so, jamming away to Police's "Message in a bottle". The song finishes and the boys choose another song and jam away some more. Then that song finishes and one boy asks the kid standing behind him if he wants to play. This kid shakes his head so the kid turns back to the game and chooses "Message in a bottle" again. I ask if one of them is going to let JE have a turn. Now suddenly neither kid wants to give up his guitar and they start arguing among themselves but finally the first kid relents and hands his guitar over to JE and he starts playing.

Then my cell phone rings and it's Liz is telling me to come outside to help. I tell her I'm not helping because I'm not lifting the TV, not even with help from a clerk. Liz tells me she needs help getting the doo-hicky thingamajiggy off from the back parcel area. It's kind of a retractable privacy thingy you can pull out to cover stuff in the back so people can't see what's in there and be tempted to break into your car, unless they're a bastard and they want to break in to see what's under the cover. Now the privacy thingy pops in and out of its fitted sockets like a toilet roll holder but Liz doesn't know this and the TV won't fit into the back of our SUV with the privacy cover still in place. We have a little discussion over the phone with her telling me to come out and me telling her I'm not coming out because JE just got a turn on the game and I'm not leaving him by himself and I'm not pulling him off the game because he just got on so someone needs to come in to the store to relieve me. Finally Liz and the MIL arrive so I go out and here is the TV in the back of our SUV. The FIL worked out how to remove the privacy cover thingy on his own and he and the clerk loaded the TV, so I go off and park and we go back into the store only to meet Liz, JE & the MIL coming out.

On the way home Liz tells me the MIL wanted to buy Guitar Hero for JE, until Liz told her that she'd need to buy a PS2 as well. I'd totally do it although you really need a second guitar (only one comes with the game) so you're looking at around $250 all up just to play Guitar Hero. But then I'd also have a PS2 ;)

At the in-laws the MIL wheels out this dolly and we slide the TV onto it and wheel it into their house with little hassle, except for JE getting upset when he tried to help us get the TV in the front door and we asked him to move, loudly, because we panicked and didn't want him to get squished by a TV three times his size. So he ran and threw himself facedown on their sofa and cried far onger than I thought was necessary so he was probably just milking it because we're at the in-laws and they let him get away with that crap, but it doesn't happen in my house. Ok, so it does, it just doesn't go on anywhere near as long as it does at the in-laws.

We left the kids with the in-laws and Liz and I stopped for lunch at a local steakhouse/sportsbar and despite it being high noon the place was almost empty. It got a little busier but not much, unlike the Best Buy which had people all over the place. I figure everyone was too busy shopping to stop and eat. After lunch Liz tried to talk me into going shopping (again) but I had to put my foot down. I told her if she wanted to go shopping she could drop me at home then go out by herself. Liz said if we went home she wouldn't want to come back out. Then the cunning woman tried a different strategy. "Let's do something together," she said. "Like what," I said, giving her a suspicious look. Yep, I could see it in her eyes. Her "something together" is almost inevitably shopping, which involves me following her around her stores at a mall until she tells me to stop following her, so then I sit down and wait for her to finish at that store and off we go to another store where I sit down and watch her and the other women shop, most of whom also have a miserable looking guy in tow who you can tell really doesn't want to be there but he also fell for the old "Let's do something together" idea. If we stop at my stores (video games of course ;) it takes barely a minute before Liz gets bored and wants to leave to continue shopping at her stores.

Women think we don't get it. Oh we get it, alright. You love shopping. But it's not just shopping, it's browsing through an endless supply of clothes which you pick out and carry around then either try on but leave with the changing room clerk, or you don't try them on and just leave them on a nearby clothes rack, or you just buy them. Then you visit the next store and the cycle repeats. And when you get home you leave everything you bought in the bag with the receipt, and next week when you go shopping the first thing you do is visit these same stores and return everything you bought last week!!! Then once more you wander around the stores, picking out several items which you either try on and discard, or just discard, or buy but not wear and return the following week. And the cycle continues.

Oh yeah, we get it alright. We may not understand why you do it, but we still get this thing you call "shopping".

What we don't get is why you don't get that not only don't we want to be there, but we don't have to be there. This is not quality time we're spending here. This is not dinner and a movie. This is not watching a live sports game (which, by the way, if you told us you didn't want to go, we wouldn't make you). This is shopping. And it's not even shopping, it's Shopping According to Woman ®. And while you may ask our opinion while we're participating in this thing you call Shopping, you don't really want or even accept our opinion; you'll still buy (or not buy) whatever you've picked out, and then you'll come back next week and return it.

See what we really don't get is when we ask you to come to the ballgame with us and you say ok, even though you hate baseball and really don't want to be there. Then you ask us to go shopping and unlike you, we let you know that we don't want to be there, but we're still expected to go along because you went to the ballgame even though you didn't want to, so now we're expected to return the favor.

Newflash! If you don't want to go to the ballgame, just say No! We're not going to hold it against you! We'll still go, unless you ask us not to (and we will hold that against you), but if you don't want to go to the ballgame just say so. Now maybe you do want to go, and that's great, but that still doesn't mean we want to go or have to go shopping with you...even though most of us still do, but we don't enjoy it (and you can't make us!) and instead we could be home reading the paper or watching the TV or on the computer or hanging out with our guy friends.

So you don't want to go the ballgame with us, but you go anyway, and we don't want to go shopping with you, but we go anyway, so we're both doing things with each other that we both don't enjoy, and we just suffer through them, and we call that Quality Time.

I think Jerry Seinfeld said it best, "What's up with that?"

Quality time is time spent doing something both parties enjoy doing. If the woman doesn't enjoy going to the ballgame, that's not quality time even if she's there with her guy because she's not enjoying herself. Quality time is not time spent shopping with the wife because now the guy is not enjoying himself. If the woman wants to go shopping why is the guy forced to come along? Oh, you don't force us, no, you just get all pouty and mope around until we give in. If you want to go shopping then just go already! Knock yourself out. You'll probably enjoy yourself more without us tagging along. But don't think we don't get it. Don't think we don't know the real reason you want us there. You just need someone to carry around the stuff you've bought. We get it alright.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

The Toyota Prius

The City of Los Angeles (as in the government entity) owns several Toyota Prius hybrids, being the vehicle with both an electric motor and a gasoline engine. I like driving them because the City also acquired HOV Lane Passes for them, so I get to use the Carpool (High Occupancy Vehicle) Lanes even when I'm by myself. I also like driving the Ford Contours because they drive remarkably well for a vehicle that's not a sports car...but I don't get to use the HOV Lane when I'm in a Contour.

Today I had to drive down to Santa Ana, a city in Orange County, which is located approximately 36 miles or 57 kilometres from downtown Los Angeles. I'm on pretty good terms with the mechanic at the garage so I usually get the vehicle I ask for, and sometimes I get it without needing to ask, like today; George saw where I was going and promptly gave me a set of Prius keys.

So, why do you need to know this? The Prius has an onboard computer which shows the mileage you're getting, both current and cumulative. Someone reset the counter in my vehicle 3,000 miles ago and since then it has averaged 41.7mpg, or 5.67litres/100km. On the freeway while cruising around 70mph I was getting damn close to 50mpg, but occasionally I noticed in congested traffic the mileage would drop to around 30mpg, about the same as I'd expect from a non-hybrid Prius, so obviously the two averaged out to around 40mpg.

What does this mean to you? Well, maybe you're thinking of getting a hybrid, but you're wondering just how good it really is. They're more economical than the average vehicle, but they're also more expensive, a few thousand dollars more expensive. Let's crunch some numbers, shall we?

In Los Angeles it's not uncommon to drive approximately 50 miles each day getting to work and back. I noticed we'd be filling our Focus up almost every week and it has about a 250 mile range and usually gets around 25mpg. With fuel here in California costing approx. $2.50 per gallon those 250 miles in the Focus cost me $25. If I were driving a hybrid Prius and getting 41.7mpg I'd only use 6 gallons per 250 miles, which would cost me $15. So I'd save $10 per week which equates to a savings of just 40¢/10 miles. Not a lot, right? But I'm only driving 250 miles per week (actually I'm driving even less now. Public Transport roxxorz!)

Well, the more you drive, the more you save. Someone driving in from Riverside, if they get the HOV Pass, will save both time and money. Riverside to downtown L.A. is around 60 miles each way, 120 miles per day, or 600 miles per week. And yes, quite a few people do that commute (or longer) every day. 600 miles is a weekly saving of $24, and over 52 weeks means you save yourself $1300 per year. Drive the car for 3 years and you save almost $4,000...which is probably close to the price difference between a regular Prius and the Hybrid.

So, now you can do the math, factoring in the price difference, and work out whether or not it's worth you getting a Prius.

Monday, November 20, 2006

The cheap upgrade that almost wasn't

either an upgrade, or cheap.

Liz & I stopped by BestBuy today where I saw a deal that was almost too good to be true (yeah yeah, I know what they say about deals too good to be true). It was a 120GB Hard Drive for just $50. No Mail-In Rebate. No Gift Card. It was a straight up $50 (+tax) Hard Drive. By comparison most hard drives in the 100 to 150GB range are $100 to $150. It was the last one on the shelf so I bought it.

Got it home, opened my case, hooked up the hard drive, started Windows but the new hard drive could not be found.

I booted off the CD that comes with the hard drive and noticed in the startup that there was no Primary Slave Drive (which is where the new hard drive was supposed to show up). After fooling around with the hard drive cables and rebooting my computer several times the new hard drive finally showed up and I was able to format and partition it.

I restarted the computer but now it claims it can't find a necessary system file. WTF? I check the cables..."They're ok, folks!"

I reboot the computer but it still can't find the necessary system file and refuses to start up.

I disconnect the new hard drive and reboot, nada, zip. No signal from the box to the monitor. WTF?

The lights are on the box, there's whirring coming from the hard drive. Fan is running. CD drive works. The keyboard & mouse lights are on. But the monitor says it's got nothin'.

Reboot.

Nothing.

WTF?

Have I managed to fry something in my computer? Now it's only my computer. The new hard drive is nowhere near the box and I'm pissed.

Reboot.

Nothing.

I disconnect my hard drive and connect an old hard drive we have lying around.

Reboot.

Nothing.

I try different hard drive cables.

Nothing.

Maybe it's my video card, which is very close to the hard drive bays, and could have taken a bump while I was fooling around. I make sure the video card is seated properly. Reboot. Nothing.

I have a spare video card but when I locate the adaptor plug to switch between DVI and VGA signals, the adaptor plug won't work. It's an adaptor plug, but it's male-to-male, I need a female-to-male adaptor plug. WTF?!?!

In frustration (and concerned that maybe I've killed my computer and it will cost me a fortune to replace it) I return my computer to it's old configuration. Original old hard drive, etc, plug everything back in and toss it under my desk.

Liz and I go out to dinner. I tell her the damn thing will probably boot up tomorrow night as if nothing ever happened.

We get home from dinner and I decide to hit the power button, just for the hell of it.

My computer boots up.

Bastard!

Have I learned my lesson?

Hell no! Tonight, I give the new hard drive another try!

Saturday, November 18, 2006

The joke that wasn't

This afternoon we arrived at the in-laws to drop the kids off for the afternoon. A few blocks from their house I'd called to let them know we were almost there, and we would have been, too, if it wasn't for those meddling kids. I mean, the congested traffic on account of some parade. So it took us several minutes longer than usual to drive the couple of blocks. At the in-laws we parked in their garage next to the FIL's car, got the kids out, and were about to head up the stairs to their house when our car horn started beeping.

Liz and I looked at each other then she looked at her keyring, thinking maybe she'd pressed the panic button. The horn stopped, then beeped again and we were like WTF??? Then it stopped again. We were halfway up the stairs when the horn gave a couple more beeps, and I was thinking something was wrong with our car. We entered the in-laws house and called out to the FIL (we'd parked in the MILs spot so we knew she wasn't home). The FIL called out but his voice sounded a little distant. We figured he was upstairs so JE went to the bottom of the stairs and called out to him...then the FILs voice came from behind us.

He'd reclined the seat in his car and had been lying down in it, thinking to surprise us or scare us, and it hadn't been our car at all but his that had been tooting. I think we'd taken so long to arrive that he'd fallen asleep. Their downstairs garage is fairly dark so we hadn't seen him lying in the car when we'd parked next to him, and he hadn't woken up until we'd started to head upstairs, probably woken up by the kids voices. He'd tooted his horn like he'd planned, but it was a little too late to have the desired effect. In a way he had scared us, but only because I was afraid something had gone wrong with our brand new car :P

It wasn't scary

until the Zombie showed up with a rifle that he knew how to use. I raised my handgun, intending to put a round through his head but the reloaded rounds I had in the clip were all messed up and the first round I fired came out so slow I could see it. I could have almost caught it, too, because it dropped to the ground between our feet. I adjusted my aim accordingly, aiming several feet over the Zombie's head even though just a few feet separated us and this shot was successful. Well, I was successful in putting a round through his head but he didn't go down. Damn reloads. Then the bloody thing started talking as he chased me up onto the roof of the farmhouse, saying how three weeks ago it wouldn't have been possible to have a Zombie that knew how to use a gun.

I jumped off the roof, using the window awnings to break my fall, but when I knocked on the door my fellow Marines refused to let me in. I guess I couldn't blame them. We'd landed on this planet to investigate why there'd been no communication for some time, only to find ourselves trapped in a farmhouse on a planet overrun by Zombies that had been slowly killing us off. If one of the marines had came to the door and knocked to be let back in, I'm not sure I'd open the door either, after all, he's outside, so he must be a Zombie.

Fortunately (for my brother Marines) Anzac chose that moment to bark at something, prompting Liz to tell him to shut up, which woke me up, otherwise I suspect this dream would have gone the way of almost all of my dreams with this kind of theme. My brother Marines would have been killed to a man, with just me left alive. Yes, I'm the one outside with all the Zombies, but they're the ones that would have been killed. I don't know why these apocalyptic dreams of mine end this way, they just do.

Saturday, November 11, 2006

A word to new parents

Make sure any bath toys you have for your children are small enough to sail away to the great beyond, or are too big to be flushed at all.

I just spent two hours working on the kids' toilet because it wouldn't flush again.

When my family were here a few weeks ago the kids' toilet backed up and we attributed it to so many people using it. What had actually happened was that our daughter, who loves playing with the toilet (and who has been caught coming out of the bathroom drinking from a cup, but she can't reach the taps!!!), had sailed/flushed several small toy plastic boats down the loo, and all but one of them had made it. The "little boat which couldn't" had got stuck at the back of the toilet, up in behind the S-bend, and there it had stayed, snagging toilet paper and...other stuff, basically preventing the toilet from flushing properly.

I had to drain the toilet bowl and tank, which meant scooping water out of the bowl. Given that JE had used the toilet the night before, and it hadn't flushed properly then (and it was obvious it hadn't flushed, if you know what I'm saying), this was not a pleasant experience. Not...at...all.

I then siphoned the water out of the tank, mopped it dry, turned off the water at the wall, disconnected the pipe, and removed the tank. Then I mopped out the bowl, unbolted it from the floor, turned it over and there was this yellow & green (& brown) boat. I tried pushing it back out the way it had came but that didn't work. To get it out I needed to pull it a bit (carefully) then rotate it to get it out a little more, then rotate it, pull, etc until EUREKA!!! Out came the yellow & green (& brown) boat!

Then bolt the toilet back to the floor, put the tank back on, hook up the water, turn it back on, check for leaks (had one, tightened the appropriate nut. Leak! BE GONE!) wait for the tank to fill then FLUSH and away goes the water, just like it's supposed to! Yes!

I don't know how much I just saved us by not needing to call out a Plumber. I suspect it was in the vicinity of a few hundred dollars, unless the Plumber had some nifty gadget by which he could hook the boat and pull it back out without taking the toilet apart, and being a professional plumber he just might have some nifty gadget that allows him to do that. Even still, a Housecall for one Plumber needing to use a gadget to remove a blocked toilet, I'd guess in the realm of $200 or so.

I placed a bid on eBay for World of Warcraft:The Board Game. If I win it, I'll pay less than $60. After saving us at least $150, and most likely more, I think I can afford to buy myself a little present. WoW:TBG is more of a social game played not unlike old school Dungeons & Dragons, by a group of friends sitting around a table, playing & socializing. I bought it not because I love WoW:The Online Game, but because I see WoW:TBG as a way of having some fun with the family as a whole, rather than everyone sitting down on their own computer, doing their own thing.

It could be argued that as the objective of WoW:TBG is for one side (2 to 8 players) to defeat the other, it's not exactly family friendly, but as most board games are of the "complete the objective/defeat your opponents first" variety, I don't see how WoW:TBG is any different.

Yes, it's going to cost close to $60, but if you could see the amount of bits & pieces you get with this game, $60 is a fairly good price. RRP is $80+tax so I'm saving at least $20. Fix a toilet, save $150 or more. Buy WoW:TBG, save $20 or so ;)

Thursday, November 09, 2006

Fun with Gnomes

A few months ago I rolled a new character in the World of Warcraft, a Gnome Warrior whom I dubbed Gnomadic. Gnomadic's goal in life was to cross the ocean to Kalimdor and visit the Horde in their capital city of Orgrimmar, and he succeeded at this. Now in the World of Warcraft if a player enters one of the opposing faction's capital cities he automatically gets flagged PvP, which means he can be attacked and killed by any member of the opposing faction. So by entering Orgrimmar, Gnomadic became flagged and despite being a very low level character some members of the Horde still felt compelled to kill him, but that's ok; I was in their city and some people are just afraid of Gnomes ;) Gnomadic hung out in Orgrimmar for a bit and even danced with a female Troll before I logged out to play on one of my regular characters.

A few days ago my niece was introducing WoW to a friend of hers. She'd rolled a new character and she asked me if I had a low level character so I could join them. My lowest character was Gnomadic, but he was still in Orgrimmar on Kalimdor; my niece and her friend were in the Alliance starting area on the Alliance continent known (rather boringly) as the Eastern Kingdoms. So I logged on Gnomadic and activated my Hearthstone, which teleports me to the Inn I'd last chosen to call "home". It teleported me to the Goblin village of Ratchet, just a little way down the coast from Orgrimmar. Fortunately there's three boats that sail from Kalimdor to the Eastern Kingdoms, and one of them leaves from Ratchet. But the boat from Ratchet would take me to the Goblin port called Booty Bay, at the southernmost tip of the Eastern Kingdoms, and separating Booty Bay from the rest of the Eastern Kingdoms is Stranglethorn Vale, a jungle filled with level 30 to 40 critters who'd just love to snack on a low level Gnome.

Now as well as the port, Ratchet has a Griffin Post, which I could use to fly to different cities in Kalimdor, except when I spoke to the Flight Master he told me I didn't know any other places to fly to. The next closest city with a boat to the Eastern Kingdoms is a little ways south of Ratchet, but again I'd have to brave level 30+ monsters to get there. Just then the boat pulled up to the dock and I made my choice. As I ran towards the boat a Horde player coming the other way couldn't resist having a swing at me. When I'd logged in I'd still been in Orgrimmar which had flagged me, and I'd remain flagged for at least five minutes. Sitting on the boat was a hairy experience because taking the same trip were two Horde players of considerably higher level than me, who could probably kill me in one hit if they so chose.

As we sailed across the ocean the uncertainty of the moment was very nerve wracking. If I died out here I didn't know what would happen to my body. Would it fall into the water, or would it remain on the boat? My spirit would spawn at the nearest GY and I could ressurect there, or I could resurrect at my body if it wasn't at the bottom of the ocean. Fortunately we made it to Booty Bay without incident.

As I ran down the pier towards the hub of the town, one of the Orcs from the boat attacked me from behind. The level disparity meant I had no chance and death came quickly. But Booty Bay is a neutral town, neither Alliance nor Horde; both sides are free to visit as long as they do so peacefully. The Booty Bay Militia who keep the peace were quick to retaliate and they snared the Orc with nets, holding him in place. Outnumbered and unable to run the Orc died almost as quickly as he'd killed me.

The Booty Bay GY is just outside the front gate so I walked my ghost inside and resurrected at my body then tracked down the Booty Bay Flight Master...who gave me the bad news that Gnomadic's lack of knowledge of the world meant he still could not fly anywhere. To get to the lowbie area where my niece was I'd need to swim up the coast, a trip which takes 10 to 15 minutes but which would be considerably safer and less stressful than running through the jungle and dying repeatedly at the claws of lvl 35 Tigers, Raptors, Gorillas, etc.

As I ran back down towards the dock the same Orc decided to attack me again, but this time I actually survived his first blow. The Orc must have thought he'd take me out in one hit again because he didn't stop to finish me off, choosing to leap off the side of the dock instead. But he didn't count on the Booty Bay guards and their lightning fast reactions and once more their nets snared him, practically in midair, and he died yet again while I stood by laughing my arse off. To really add insult to injury the second Orc had seen the whole thing and he burst out laughing as well.