KCET & McDs

I took JE & his Tiger Cub Scout buddy "W" for a tour of the local KCET Studio yesterday. We lucked out in getting in on that. I called them asking about tours because the boys needed to do a tour of a TV Studio or Newspaper Office to help earn their Tiger Cub badge. The first person I spoke to said they didn't do tours anymore, but she transferred me to a fellow that she said might be able to help and I guess I hit the right chord with him because he said to shoot him off an email and he'd see what he could do.

So I sent him an email and never heard anything back, and was thinking I'd have to write off the KCET Tour and do a tour of the local newspaper office instead. Then last week the guy called back and said he could do the tour around 10:30 this Sunday, so 10am found me and JE picking up W and we were off to west LA and KCET.

We arrived around 10:45 and after chatting with the security guard out the front who called our guy to verify we were ok to be there, we were in. I got a couple of pictures of the boys next to the "Welcome to KCET" sign then our guide arrived to show us around. We got to see pretty much everything inside KCET, the editing board, the recording studio, a green stage room, and a stage where a game show was being filmed while we stood watching in the wings. It was pretty cool. Afterwards I got a picture of the boys standing under a Sesame Street street sign.

With the boys complaining they were hungry (in fact they'd been complaining before the tour started) we were off down the road to the closest McDonalds where I ran into the McDonald's cashiers from hell. Ok, not really their fault. They were obviously new. But that excuse has a very short expiration date.

I ordered two Happy Meals, one with a plain Cheeseburger, and one with six pieces of nuggets.

Wait, slow down, said the cashier.

Dude, I didn't order that quickly, and what's so hard to understand about two Happy Meals, one with a plain Cheeseburger and one with a six-piece of nuggets. Ok, technically the Happy Meal with the six-piece is a Big Kids Meal, but seriously, that wasn't a complicated order...unless you're new on the job, like my guy.

He finally got my order right after two other employees came over to help, one of which was the Shift Manager, but I still had to explain several times that I wanted two Happy Meals, one with a plain Cheeseburger, and one with the six piece of nuggets.

Now W is a rather peculiar child. He doesn't like ketchup (or catsup...or tomato sauce) with his fries; he likes ice cream. Last time I took JE & W to McDs for lunch I relented and bought him a small vanilla shake...wait, that was the first time we ate at McDs. So W had his ice cream and he was dipping his fries in and eating them, and I'm ok with that. I prefer a chocolate shake for my fries but some like chocolate, some like vanilla. Then disaster struck. W knocked over his shake which naturally ran out all over the place because you can't have the lid on your shake if you're dipping your fries.

The second time we ate at McDs W was drinking his milk from those cute little bottles they have. Like JE, he was using a straw. Unlike JE, who'd lifted his bottle off the edge of the table and held it down low so his straw and bottle were mostly vertical, W just tipped his bottle towards him, so bottle and straw were mostly horizontal, and the almost full bottle of milk was quickly emptied into W's lap.

Remembering the ice cream incident, with recap provided by JE, I was reluctant to get W even a small ice cream lest he make a mess. He ate a couple of the fries and declared them delicious, and I thought we were good to go. What kid doesn't love french fries? W doesn't. He asked for a second plain Cheeseburger, yes, he'd eaten the first. With money from his mom in my pocket I figured I couldn't let the kid go hungry, so I approached the counter and ordered a second plain Cheeseburger, from a different cashier this time. Just the Cheeseburger. Not a meal, nothing complicated; one plain Cheeseburger.

Got the Cheeseburger, unwrapped it, and saw lettuce on the sides, and onion. Lifting up the lid I saw a couple of pickles, and vegies and ketchup and sauce everywhere. This was not a plain Cheeseburger.

Excuse me, I said, I ordered a plain Cheeseburger. (WTF is up with your staff today???)

Literally within seconds the cooks had slapped a cheese-covered patty inside a bun and W's second plain Cheeseburger was in my hands. Kudos to them.

Then I saw the Shift Manager ask the cashier if I'd ordered a plain Cheeseburger, and he promptly shook his head.

Guess what, pal? The Shift Manager saw the problems I had earlier trying to order a Happy Meal with a plain Cheeseburger. She knows I ordered a plain Cheeseburger this time, too. Don't lie to the man, especially if she's a woman.

I didn't humiliate the guy by making a point out of it and saying I had ordered a plain Cheeseburger, but I'm sure the Shift Manager spoke to him afterwards anyway.

I've got no problems with McDs hiring 16-year olds and paying them minimum wage and working their arses off, but I'm not going to make allowances for them. I did my time in retail and customer service and quite frankly if you can't perform, if you can't provide excellent customer service, you've got no business being there. Yeah, you're only getting minimum wage and you've got rude customers up in your face, but that's part of retail and if you can't deal with that don't get a job in customer service. I could deal with that. I was bloody good at it, but it doesn't pay the bills. That's the only reason I left. I'd still be working in retail and kissing up to you and licking your boots and I'm so good at it that you'd totally believe I was loving every second of it, if it paid the bills, but it doesn't and that's why I'm not there any longer.

I understand new people on the job need to learn the ropes. So learn the ropes, get the job done and when you mess up be man enough to say, "Yeah, he could have ordered a plain Cheeseburger. I might have missed that." There are so many people willing to kiss arse for minimum wage that to keep someone on who's not going to give 100% is just inexcusable. You're doing yourself a disservice by hiring substandard help, you're doing your current staff a disservice by teaming them up with someone who's not going to pull their weight, and you're doing your customers a disservice by having them served by someone who's not going to provide excellent customer service. If you can't stand the heat, get out of McDonalds.